Jokes about Eminem from the largest music humor site on the web. Check out the index for other performers we have jokes about.
Chuck Norris can look at a clock, flex and turn back time. Eminem can look at a clock tilt his head and change it back.
Did you hear about eminem? He married a skittle and is living in hawaii now with three candy-babies.
Don't mess with Eminem because he's straight out the hood.. that's right, his mom gave birth to him on the hood of the trailer.
Dude 1: Oh my god yesterday I saw Eminem! Dude2: The rapper? Dude 1: No dude the candy! Eminem: *walks in from no where* Oh my god really?!? Dude 1: Yeah! Dude 2: oh my god it's Eminem! Eminem and Dude 1: WHERE?!?
Eminem don't hit girls he wrappa slappa them
Eminem is a candy wrapper.
Eminem is so stupid that if my dog was that stupid he could walk backwards and wag his head or he would shave his head and call it his butt.
Eminem looks like the guy from Eiffel 65 (I'm blue da ba de) only you were too busy pretending he wrote his own songs and beats that you didn't pay attention. :)
Eminem walked up to Chuck Norris and said, "I'm Not Afraid," so Chuck Norris said, "I Love the Way You Lie."
Eminem's new record sucked so much that he is now going to have to make a new record, making fun of his last one.
Eminem, can't be both the candy and the wrapper.
Eminem, he ain't playing! He's got a Peanut for a brain!
Eminem, you are what you eat. Candy boy.
Eminem: I can't be your Superman Me: I love the way you lie Eminem: I'm not afraid Me: your my rap god..... And I'm here in Shady's world
Guy 1: What would happen if Eminem became anorexic, and started wearing sunglasses from now on?
Guy2: He'd be the 'Real' Slim Shady
Guy1: Do you know Eminem's favorite kinda of girl! Guy2: Black girls, Skinny girls, fat girls Im calling all girls! Guy1: I was gonna say the white ones that cheat on you and tell you your obsessed! Guy2: Where you talking? I was singing an Eminem song you know before he was gay! Guy1: WHAT! Hes not gay! Guy2: Sing this song! Guy1: I was born with a dick in my brain/ Yeah fucked in the head/ My step father said that I sucked in the bed! Guy2: uh-huh Guy1: I dont like you Jesus! First you say Santa isnt real! Then you say my mom is a prostitute! Whats next are you going to say Jay-Z worships the devil! Jesus: Fucking Idiot!
Hailie's song starts....... Eminem: yo, I can't sing Me : I love the way u lie
I hate when you;re the real slim shady but everyone else stands up
If Eminem was a good at basketball as he is rapping, he would be picked before the black kids.
Man: Did you hear that Eminem failed high school?
Other man: Well, he's no Smartie!
Person 1: Do you like Eminem? Person 2: I prefer Skittles. Person 1: No, I mean the rapper. Person 2: Who eats the wrapper?!
Singers are like candy......
Throw out all the 'wrappers' especially 'M&M's
THE MTV VIDEO AWARDS:
Triumph, the Insult Comic Dog: "You're hair is smooth...like a beagle's n*****k."
Eminem: "You better shut your mouth before I bust you up!"
Robert Smigel (the puppetteer): "Hey, calm down; it was just a joke!"
Eminem: "I wasn't talkin' to you, yo; I was talkin' to that dog!"
What is Eminem's favorite paper?
Wrapping paper.
When some one throws me skittles and say taste the rainbow! I throw M&Ms and scream"I'm not afraid!"
You know why Eminem isn't a Cage fighter? because they don't' have a ''Wuss'' Division.
Your mommas so stupid I asked her to go to the store and buy me some M&M's and she came back with the Marshall Mathers LP 2
.guy 1- i love eminem. .guy 2- i like skittles better. .guy 1- no the rapper idiot.! .guy 2- you the idiot, and anyway, whats so good about eminem wrappers??
Dear Eminem, We have a lot in common. We both have the same name and black on the inside. Can you guess Who I am? From, M&M
KID 1: my dads a police man KID 2:my dads a fire man, beat that KID 3:my dads a moviestar, BEAT THAT HAILIE:a moviestar, ppfftt, my dads EMINEM, sit down and shut up.
What did the piece of toast say to eminem. Toast: just gonna stand there and watch me burn
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