(as sung by Eowyn)
He was a man, she was an Elf
Can I make it anymore obvious?
She braided hair, he hunted orcs,
what more can I say?
He wanted her she wouldn't tell
She didn't want the fate of Tinuviel
Then old Elrond, stuck up his nose
He wanted to put her on a boat

He was a Ranger boy,
She said see ya' later boy
She didn't like his greasy hair
He was a Ranger boy,
She said see ya' later boy,
She rather get hitched to Haldir

Five months at home, she sits at home
Aside from Elrond she's all alone
She heads to Gondor,
What does she see?
Ranger boy has become a king
She calls up Gimli,
He alread knows
How Ranger boy made Sauron hit the road

He was a Ranger boy she said see ya' later boy,
She didn't like his greasy hair
Now he's restored Numenor
Sitting on his own throne
Shone Middle-Earth just what he's worth

Sorry She-elf you missed out
when the world was left in doubt
I am more than just Dernhelm
This is how this Age will end

He's just a king, and I'm just a girl,
Can I make it anymore obvious
We are in love, screw Faramir
We can conquer all the world

(chorus, repeat... eowyn is dragged off by men in white coats)