Right now, he's prob-ly daydreamin' bout a big bad ewe and behavior that is risky
Right now, he's prob-ly thinkin' of her fluffy little tail, hopin' she'll be frisky
Right now, he's prob-ly ruminatin' that no one could possibly figure out where he goes
But he don't know...

That I slashed my knife right through the hide
Of my hubby's dirty secret part-time bride
Carved her up down to her little feets
I served a platter of haggis with great delight
Now the sheep's in him tonight
Maybe next time he'll quit before she bleats

Right now, he's prob-ly still thinkin' 'bout that slut waitin' while he's headin' for the pasture
Right now, he's prob-ly sippin' Woolite, and he's a-thinkin' that she's more mature than last year
Right now, he's prob-ly lookin' for his three buck jar of that new-mown hay smell
Oh, he'll burn in Hell

So I lured her out behind the barn
With my sudden urgent need to spin some yarn
Sheepishly she went to her defeat
I made an excellent meal he'll love to munch
Sacrificial lamb for lunch
Maybe next time he'll quit before she bleats

I might-a caused a little ruckus in the barnyard
And the next ewe I hear bleat
Oh, she'd best be afraid of me
Oh-oh-oh, 'fraid of me...

'Cause I dug my knife into the hide
Of my hubby's saucy lamb chop part-time bride
Then I served him as he took a seat
I carved that platter of haggis with great delight
Yes, the sheep's in him tonight
Maybe next time he'll quit before she bleats
Oh, maybe next time he'll quit...before she bleats
Oh, before she bleats
Baa-aaa-aaa...