All my friends are drinkin', aimin' to get hammered
But I for one, can't get why they're all enamoured
Cause after one sip, for more I don't plan to clamour
What am I drinki-in'?
I shouldn't have left the orderin' to my mates
I could've got so-omethin' that I know tastes grea-eat
Instead of this myst'ry liquid that I hate
What am I drinki-in'?
Oh, can't anyone he-ere explai-ain
What's goin' down my throat 'fore it's too la-ate?

Because it woudn't be too hard to stop
Downin' drinks for five
Damn seconds and answer me-e-e
I just wanna know what weird drink
Ta-astes like printer ink
Mixed with moldy, unwashed fee-ee-eet
The foam on to-op's congeali-in'
So what am I drinki-in'?
What am I dri-inki-in'?

Lemme try your wine, because this booze makes my tongue reel
Thrown at the wall, I'm sure the paint would peel
Shocked there was not a return of my meal
What am I drinki-in'?
Seems you really like that drink you're chuggin' faster
And seein' as you are currently plastered
You won't mind if I have the smallest of samples?
What are you drinki-in'?
Oh, it seems I've made a-a mista-ake
Cause this stuff is even worse than mine, ma-ate

I mean, this is a real disgustin' wine
Is this red or white?
Either way, I disagree-ee-ee
With the manner you're drinkin' this
Wo-orse than my dog piss
I can't knock this back with glee-ee-ee
No, your wine lea-eaves me reeli-in'
So what are you drinki-in'?

Might just try all of these, man, see if any of this booze
Contains flavours that's not gonna induce
Violent escape from my organs, it's true
What are y'all drinki-in'?
I'm wond'rin' if the problem lies within this place
Or does the issue lie with the way my tastebuds taste?
Too obvious and so I repeat, mate:
What am I drinki-in'?
No, what are you drinki-in'?
No, what are we drinki-in'?
I know this is my first booze atte-empt
But I can't believe that it a-all tastes shi-it

Cause I don't wanna learn I wasted time
Taste-testin' your wines
Beers, spirits, vodkas, gins, plea-ea-ease
I just wanted to hang out with
Peo-eople for once, shit
Without bein' your taxi-i-i
This news has go-ot me reeli-in'
Not sure wha-at I shou-ould be feeli-i-in'
Wanted to try drinki-in'
What whas I dri-inkin'

Got disappointed feelin's
This crap that I'm drinkin'
Rather be drinkin' a whole coffee pot
Not this rot, straight from the drain
Ah, hahaha