May I have your attention please?
May I have your attention please?
Will the real Cornholio please stand up?
I repeat, will the real Cornholio please stand up?
We're gonna have a problem here..

Y'all act like you never seen a bunghole before
Jaws all on the floor like in a camper, like Anderson just burst in the door
and started hog-tyin' me worse than before
'cause he caught me in there whackin' off (Ahh!)
It's the return of the... "Ah, wait, no way, you're kidding,
he didn't just do what I think he did, did he?"
And Butthead said... nothing you idiots!
Butthead's dead, he's locked in my basement! (Ha-ha!)
Teenagers love Cornholio (bungo jungo jungo)
"Cornholio, I dunno
Look at him, walkin around yakkin' about his butt
Tryin' to score with sluts,"
(Daria) "He's so weird though!"
Yeah, I probably got a million of screws up in my head loose
But no worse than what's goin on in Anderson's camper's room
Sometimes, I wanna get on the phone and just let loose,
But by then, my insanity has run out of juice
"My bunghole's on your lips, my bunghole's on your lips"
And if I'm lucky, I won't get a below-the-belt kiss
And that's the joke that I've been trying to give to little kids
And expect them not to know what TP and bunghole is
Of course they gonna know what wiping your ass is
By the time there's an station break
They got a bathroom don't they?
I come from Lake Titicaca, it's in Nicaragua
My bunghole also need lots of piccata
But I sing about rollio and bungholio
Cause that'll amuse people and sell videos
But if you feel like I feel for my bungholio
Check out my portfolio, give me all your rollios

I'm Cornholio, I have no bunghole
I get loose with behaviour that's just devastating
So why you saying Cornholio please shut up
Please shut up, please shut up