-> "The Dog Walkers"
Original Song Title:
"Like Toy Soldiers"
(MP3)
Parody Song Title:
"The Dog Walkers"
The Lyrics
Step by step, yard by yard, wait--good boy
Down, down boy down...
Step by step, yard by yard, wait--good boy
Down, down boy down, we're dog walkers
Sit girl sit, roll over, time to go in
Back outside tomorrow we're dog walkers
Early mornin I go walkin with my dogs, yeah, keep on gawking
A collie, a hound, and three toy poodles who don't stop squawking
Now when they have to go they poop it, my job's to be sure to scoop it
Put it in a biodegradable bag, that's where I group it
Don't matter I like to bring them to dog parks where they can run free
Keep lots of Milky Bone treats in my shorts so they come and don't leave me
I need to be the leader, my pack looks for me to guide 'em
If the dog catcher comes around, I'm make sure to run and hide 'em
For the ticks I give them Frontline, the best I'd say it's sub-lyme
If bugs are looking for a home they're whacked in no time
I feed them before walkin they chow down on Kibbles and Bits
I can't believe they broke in my beer cooler they're drinkin my Schlitz
And even though the puppies were drunk, they still all went walkin
Bobbin and weavin and stumbling on, the neighbors all are talkin
But nosy neighbors bug me but they are the leash of my problems
There's always something worse I find one of my dogs has got in
We went walkin in the woods and came upon a skunk
The hound he tried to catch him but he just got punked
Without intervention, he'll stink to high heaven
I bought gallons of tomato juice from Seven-Eleven
Now you'd think he'd be happy that I'm cleanin his head
But I think he was embarrassed cause boy was his red
The pup showed me his teeth, and his tail was all curled
I tried to help him relax, but it's a dog eat dog world
So I reach into the cupboard, find a dogfood can
Give Rover another reason, to be best friend of a man
Rub his tummy, Rover's happy, satisfied for the minute
But I'm knowin' he'll want out to take care of his business so
Step by step, yard by yard, wait--good boy
Down, down boy down, we're dog walkers
Sit girl sit, roll over, time to go in
Back outside tomorrow we're dog walkers
There used to be a time when you could let sleeping dogs lie
Just let them out in the yard and you knew that they would be fine
But now you turn your back and find you have no more tranquility
They dug and hit a wire, got charged by Miss Utility
It's a dangerous forest, these bugs see Fido as a target
We can't believe what Fido picked up for us at the flea market
Again I had to bathe him, bribed him with treats that I gave him
Who knows what's creeping around in all that hair, I'll have to shave him
Neighbor's dog is yappin', in our front yard that dog's crappin
F--- it Fido sick 'em, lick 'em and let him have it
Meanwhile my hound Rover is pullin' in another direction
The mailman's on the way and Rover's itchin for some action
Mailman throws a catalog and hits Rover with Macy's new collection
Truck is kickin dust as he peels out of our avenue
I yelled, "Rover's a blood hound, and you know that he'll be trackin you"
Rover's nose is second to none I always knew it was the best
Rover got on the computer mapped the mail route out on Mapquest
Back to song I'm angry from verse one when my dogs drank my brew
But I'm so busy being pissed off he peed on my shoe!
I want to clean up the mess but don't know what to do
We just got a new carpet so now I hope he doesn't soil it
He still insists on drinkin from the toilet
Another walk we're heading back to the woods and a pretty lake
The dogs all jump in there, come out and soak us with a shake
The yippy dogs were yappin about, they came in oodles
Fido got tired of all of that noise, he at all the poodles
We're visiting the shelter where they got dogs by the pound
We'll find another dog that doesn't make a yappy pup sound
Returning home to feed the dogs and be the dinner server
There's something wrong, I ate dog food cause those darn dogs ate my burger
I thought that it was out of reach I should have pushed it further
I hope they didn't eat too much so her tummy won't hurt her
Story's getting twisted, hope the burger wasn't rotten
It's time for me to take a final stand
I think I'm done I've rambled about as long as I can
Cause frankly I'm sick of talkin'
But I'll be back outside tomorrow walkin with my dogs squawkin cause...
Step by step, yard by yard, wait--good boy
Down, down boy down, we're dog walkers
Sit girl sit, roll over, time to go in
Back outside tomorrow we're dog walkers
Your Vote & Comment Counts
The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they
appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to
leave a comment below about this parody.
|
|
Voting Results
|
Pacing: | 5.0 | |
How Funny: | 4.9 | |
Overall Rating: | 4.9 | |
|
Total Votes: | 18 |
|
Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| | | | Pacing | | | How Funny | | | Overall Rating | |
| 1 | | 0 | |
| 0 | |
| 0 | |
|
| 2 | | 0 | |
| 0 | |
| 0 | |
|
| 3 | | 0 | |
| 0 | |
| 0 | |
|
| 4 | | 0 | |
| 1 | |
| 1 | |
|
| 5 | | 18 | |
| 17 | |
| 17 | |
|