The Lyrics
If you have, like, one shot, one game by Nintendo,
Does that make you a zealot or just plain thick?
Kid's palms are sweaty, knees weak, joypad heavy,
His GameCube's having errors already, play's unsteady,
On the surface, it looks purple, ready
To sell loads, but Nintendo's forgetting
Its sales have gone down, they're losing this bout
Because of all those sequels that they are churning out,
They're a joke and, hey, what are they smoking now?
Microsoft and Sony outsold them, and how!
They've lost rather nastily, so
They'll bounce back, will they? No,
They've got Sega in tow,
And old characters, yo,
Still got mad old Spyro,
And that sad Mario,
Virtual reality, oh,
That sucked badly, we know,
Is Yamauchi on dope
Just like Miyamoto?
They go back to their Pokémon
That's when it's back to the marketing, yo
This whole targeting,
Better sell to some gamers and not just small children,
Save yourself in the gaming
Make some consoles that don't suck
And you'll make yourself some bucks,
Because it's a great shame,
Good games are not hard to make,
Nintendo make it look hard with what they create,
Sega gave them Sonic, (Translators, learn some phonics),
Playing VirtualBoys made me catatonic,
Like Electronic Arts, they make awful games,
And Mother N thinks that with more of the same
They can keep the market pretty much tamed,
But Ninty don't realise that it's oh so lame,
Like these abbreviations of The Big N's name,
Their GBA's fame, it never came,
None at all could make games more appalling,
You must admit, Pikmin is less than enthralling,
Sales of this trash just keeps on falling,
And gamers ain't gonna pretend it ain't boring,
They moved on to the next gen', not N
Who still hears the yen calling,
And makes more rubbish like Poké Pinballing,
Sees London malls and begins to win
More stupid fans bawling for some free bad games,
(Da da dum da dum da da)
Save yourself in the gaming
Make some consoles that don't suck
And you'll make yourself some bucks,
Because it's a great shame,
Good games are not hard to make,
Nintendo make it look hard with what they create,
Save yourself in the gaming
Make some consoles that don't suck
And you'll make yourself some bucks,
Because it's a great shame,
Good games are not hard to make,
Nintendo make it look hard with what they create,
No more games, unless you change, you're so strange,
Save the unlucky reviewers from your stupid games,
I was playing in the beginning, but they never changed,
They were childish, and three is not my mental age,
But you kept writing and hyping up new tripe
While the hackers kept trying to decipher
All the codes inside, pacified all the kids
That can't get by without their gaming life
And Nintendo provides the same type of tripe for the tykes, you see,
Look at these goddamn platformers with cartoon-like snipers,
And it's no movie, camera angles aren't right, this is plain s***e
(Obvious rhyme, wasn't hard, the next line's a bit harder)
Guys forgetting to sleep, forgetting to eat, plus,
They're collapsing, caught up between trying to break the record for gaming, they're captured,
You can blame it on the games, but hey, it happens,
Though the games are crappy,
I'll stay in and watch that Lan-Jam a lot,
It's gotten me to the point, their reviews are stale,
But I still stay and watch, presenter may be shot,
She screams the games are "wicked", but no way, they're not,
Games, I love them, but this show's like Nintendo,
I like originality that they ain't got,
They're going down, I hope they rot,
But hey, so what, there are places for you, Ninty, where I'm not.
Save yourself in the gaming
Make some consoles that don't suck
And you'll make yourself some bucks,
Because it's a great shame,
Good games are not hard to make,
Nintendo make it look hard with what they create,
Save yourself in the gaming
Make some consoles that don't suck
And you'll make yourself some bucks,
Because it's a great shame,
Good games are not hard to make,
Nintendo make it look hard with what they create,
Don't buy Nintendo games, man.