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Song Parodies -> "Tough Guys Don't Cry"

Original Song Title:

"Cry"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Faith Hill

Parody Song Title:

"Tough Guys Don't Cry"

Parody Written by:

Matthias

The Lyrics

Basically the guy's response to Faith Hill's demand of making him cry for her... Which is a very demented demand to begin with...
As a man... it looks... weird... if I start to weep
So I'll... lie "There's... soap stuck here in my eyelid deep"
As a man... My e... motions... cannot be sensed
When we take on injuries... we'll never... VEEEEEENNNTTTT

Nope... We can't cry a little
Makes us look brittle
"Thanks to onion pealings my eyeballs look lame"
Near graves you're all sobbing
But we... can't look hurt
Can't cry... It's belittled it seems

Guys can snap... when enraged... and smash fists right through a tree
We can't ever... admit defeat... when a pet dies but we can scream
If my best... pal cries...
I'd think that he lost his mind
Since he just let those teardrops flow
And blamed the sunSHIIIINNEEEE, Yeah!!!

We can't cry a little
We would look crippled
If Adele made me squeal they would all call me gay
Though men... I'm not courting
Choose a different word
"Not crying there's just drizzle near me"

"You're a crybaby
All of us heard you whine
Cut yourself when shaving
There's tears in your eyes"
I'll chomp a raw steak
Snarlin' since I'm a guy...
"I'm not a pussy
Watch me... chug this beer STEEEEINNNN... Yeeeeeah!!!"

Nope... We can't cry a little
Lower lip wiggles
"I swear I was yawning"... My rep hasn't chaaaaanged
I'll slug you for taunting
Since we need to seem stern
Can't cry over quibbles, That's weak... Yeah!

Nope... Can't cry when a pistol shoots me

Ohhh nooo... Us tough guys... don't whimper like geeks

No way

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 3.6
How Funny: 4.4
Overall Rating: 4.2

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
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 2   1
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 3   0
 1
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 4   0
 1
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 5   3
 3
 3
 

User Comments

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Peter Andersson - June 14, 2016 - Report this comment
I'm such a softie that I cried at the end of the movie "The Incredible Journey". My girlfriend at the time said she loved med for it - and then she left the next week.

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