Verse 1
Solo, I look like I'm just out of schoo-oo-oo-oo-ool,
(Out of school)
But please tell me you think that Jedis are coo-oo-oo-oo-ool,
(Jedis are cool)
Now that we're back from our famous tri-i-i-i-ip,
(Famous trip)
From saving the galaxy in our little shi-i-i-i-ip,
(Little ship)
This here script George Lucas wrote is really wrong, you see,
What's Leia doing here? Because it should be you and me,

Chorus
'Cause this guy Han has got it goin' on,
He's hotter than that chick from Alderaan,
Solo, don't blame me for my sexuality,
The script here must be wrong, 'cause I'm in love with this guy Han,

Verse 2
Solo, do you remember when we flew your po-o-o-o-od?
(Flew your pod)
I said to Chewie that I thought you were ho-o-o-o-ot,
(You were hot)
You said "hyperspace ain't like dusting cro-o-o-o-ops",
(Dusting crops)
I knew I loved you then, when Chewie near blew his to-o-o-o-op,
(Blew his top)
And I know you think that you would never want my kiss,
But I know you like me better than you like my little sis,

Chorus
'Cause this guy Han has got it goin' on,
He's hotter than that chick from Alderaan,
Solo, don't blame me for my sexuality,
The script here must be wrong, 'cause I'm in love with this guy Han,

Verse 3
I asked you out, and Solo you just said no-o-o-o-o,
(You said no)
Well, I don't need you now so you can just go-o-o-o-o,
(You can go)
Have a good time with my sister, your wi-i-i-i-ife,
(With your wife)
Why don't you leave, just get out of my li-i-i-i-ife,
(Out of my life)
I know that it looks as though I quickly changed my mind,
But a guy better than my master, you're never gonna find,

Chorus
'Cause Obi-Wan has got it goin' on,
He's hotter than that stupid, ugly Han,
The reason is, of course, he can surely use the Force,
He was hot when he was young, and I'm in love with Obi-Wan.