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Song Parodies -> "Going To The Beach, Yeah"

Original Song Title:

"Beach Chair"

Original Performer:

Jay-Z

Parody Song Title:

"Going To The Beach, Yeah"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

This might seem out of place to most of you, given how your January's are cold, but down here they boil your arse off. And everything in the sea is trying to kill you.
Life is such a bore to me, no reason to wake up
'Cept for today, an invite from an old bud
Really fancy paper
"You are invited to my beach party at Glenelg, I'll see ya there"
Might be better than here
In my squeaky black chair
I'll go to the beach, yeah (yeah, yeah, yeah)
Better get my summer clothes
It's gonna be 'bout thirty-fo'
Celsius, I'm Down Under, see? (that's how we roll)
I'll check Google Maps tonight
Don't really get out much, right
I don't know the way down there, see
Well, I could really be half-arsed and get a lift from someone else
But the do's in half an hour, there's no time to do a check
If anyone's trip passes
By my house, then when they pass by I take the trip with them
Don't have their numbers on hand
So I'll just take the bus there
I hope it passes by there
Dig out my bathers from their own basket
Then, to the beach, yeah

(I'm gonna have a schwim)
This is weird for me, doing something that's social for once (for once)
(I'm gonna have a schwim)
Still, I have this thing about having something to do
(I'm gonna have a schwim)
This is weird for me, hanging out with my old friends for once (for once)
(I'm gonna have a schwim)
Also kinda weird that it wasn't via Facebook

Life's so frikkin' mean to me
So hot, thank God the
Bus has got the good air con', stepped on and what a breeze
I see some people melting
And some people are pelting
Down the street, their burning feet making them belting
"God, it's friggin' hot"
Sweat keeps runnin' down on my face
Yes, there is air 'con in this bus, ace
Doesn't matter, mate
Still, hot world means hot girls
Short shorts, something in my shorts unfurls
There is no place here where the sun don't shine
Would be fourty-four degrees in the shade, no lie
I said "It's thirty-four, yeah right"
I guess the weatherman was wrong, what a big surprise
It is hotter than hell, as far as I can tell
The kind of heat that'd make Aeryn Sun say "frell"
The time is nell, now I am here
It's time to burn up on the beach, yeah (yeah, yeah, yeah)

(I'm gonna have a schwim)
Need to cool my feet, cuz they are burning up from the sun (the sun)
(I'm gonna have a schwim)
Need to cool my feet, thank God that I'm not wearing shoes
(I'm gonna have a schwim)
What is wrong with me, it is not just my feet burning up (burn up)
(I'm gonna have a schwim)
Need to cool my me, does that make any sense to you?
Barely does to me

Universe hates me, I am Sokka-lite
I don't save the world, right
Hate the world, it gave me burns
But that just ticked me off, what pissed me off, right
What happened when I went swimming...yikes
Man, today was the day when ev'ry life
That's in the whole ocean, widened eyes
When they saw my butt and my hairy thighs
As I took that schwim that I sung about in the hook
Each jellyfish there, each pufferfish
Each great white, each cone shellfish, each stonefish, ev'ry fish
Friggin' swimming knives, all live near the beach, yeah
It was a party, was until they got here
But now they're here
I will declare
"Oh shit
Get out of here!"
We sprint cause we're scared shitless, man we can't deal with that
So wide are my eyes
Surprised I can sprint
Ev'ryone thinks "Well, that was shit"
And other curses
I get home, thank you Joe for the impromptu lift
I've got one more question 'fore I pass out here
Whose fuckin' idea was it to go to Deadly Creature Beach, yeah

(Man, that was utter shit)
Ev'ry deadly thing in the ocean just had to wake up (wake up)
Ev'ry deadly thing had a taste for the party dudes
(Man, that was utter shit)
Ev'ry deadly thing simultaneously all swam up (swam up)
Ev'ry deadly thing somehow swam faster than Mach 2
Maybe it's just me

Maybe it's just me but ev'rything today just went wrong (so wrong)
Maybe it's just me that can't be a coincidence
Maybe it's just me
Maybe it's just me but my choice to go out was just wrong (was wrong)
Maybe it's just me and I'm being ridiculous
Maybe it's just me

(That trip was utter shit)
(Just had to have a schwim)
(And just look what that did)
The constant "schwim" instead of "swim" is an Angry Beavers reference. The "swimming knives" is a stand-up bit from Dylan Moran. The word "frell" and Aeryn Sun are from Farscape, and her species (Sebacean) are heat-intolerant. Sokka is from Avatar (the airbending one, not the one with the blu smurfy cats). Glenelg is a place in Australia. And I don't actually know anyone called Joe.

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 LittleLots
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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.2

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 1
 
 3   0
 1
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 4   1
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 5   3
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 3
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Blaydeman - January 18, 2011 - Report this comment
(HHS) TCOP in da house! Great job on an off-kilter Jay-Z song that very few people actually know, and I like how you kinda used the theme of the original to fuel your parody. Clever, clever TCOP.
Abbott Skelding - January 25, 2011 - Report this comment
I love the Angry Beavers reference...nice work!
Matthias - January 26, 2011 - Report this comment
A Jay-Z song I haven't heard or even heard of but this was a good parody... And yeah it does seem out of season here but you're in that backwards continent of Australia.
EthanM - January 30, 2011 - Report this comment
This was extremely well-paced and it got pretty interesting at the end. The only negatives in my opinion are the relative obscurity of the original song and some of the references. Good job overall though - probably the best ever parody of "beach chair" by far.
Below Average Dave - January 31, 2011 - Report this comment
This was just very good TCOP--really it was, I was very impressed
Porfle Popnecker - April 20, 2012 - Report this comment
Good one. Hate the heat myself, though, and look forward to whatever cold weather we manage to get here in East Texas.
Blaydeman - April 23, 2012 - Report this comment
(ABC) See above^^^
Mark Scotti - April 24, 2012 - Report this comment
(ABC) That was a "hot" one...LOL..but seriously send some of it to Jersey..IT'S 49 TODAY!
Agrimorfee - April 24, 2012 - Report this comment
For me, yeah there was too much obscure references throughout, and I really had a tough time basically understanding what you were talking about...must be the Australian accent? (:)) More seriously, for future writing make the parody more universal, not as much about your interior thooughts--and use less swear words.
D-Mon - May 01, 2012 - Report this comment
(ABC) I found it a bit hard to follow the content, not the pacing, so I fell I missed some jokes. Sorry. What I got out of it was good, though.
Abbott Skelding - May 03, 2012 - Report this comment
See above, still a really nice work here!

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