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Song Parodies -> "Earthquake Sex"
Original Song Title:
"Birthday Sex"
Original Performer:
Jeremih
Parody Song Title:
"Earthquake Sex"
Parody Written by:
Nib Oswald
The Lyrics
There’s an earthquake and it’s getting pretty seiiiismic
Cleaving down the middle in a striiiiike-slip
Need some grease before we plug up this wiiiiide split
You should… come and hop ontop of myyyyy dick
Just love the vibration, our love’s well grounded
You’re after some traction when you get pounded
With 6 on the Richter, the fun’s compounded
Feeling this tectonic shift, girl
We begin to sli-ide
Get ready to ri-ide
Love is steaming
Shaking up your plates right
Loud screaming
Under the covers
Both sides now ali-igned
Get ready to gri-ind
Oh, your mantle will shake
Down to the core 'til you break
Earthquake sex
Earthquake sex
Ooh-ooh ooh-ooh
(Gonna sway that chandelier, girl)
Earthquake sex
Earthquake sex
Ooh-ooh ooh-ooh
(Hotspot, hotspot.
Gushing from your hotspot, hotspot. Girl)
Turn on the washing machine, set it to spin
1, 2, 3... sit you on the lid
Hear that sooouuund, vibrating within
What's that smell? Think it must be burning lint
Ten times the reaction, you'll feel the earth swing
Each rumble gets louder, you're nearly bursting
Ooh! Fissure is heating, hot lava squirting
Eruption all up in your rift, girl
Tremors down your thi-igh
Rumbling all ni-ght
Love is steaming
Shaking up the place right
Loud screaming
Under the covers
Open that divi-ide
Trembling insi-ide
Oh, your mantle will shake
Down to the core 'til you break
Earthquake sex
Earthquake sex
Ooh-ooh ooh-ooh
(Gonna sway that chandelier, girl)
Earthquake sex
Earthquake sex
Ooh-ooh ooh-ooh
(Hotspot, hotspot.
Gushing from your hotspot, hotspot. Girl)
Warming up to 2.5 before we go to sleep
Raise it to 4, we're getting naughty (naughty)
Kaboom!
We twirl around the room just like a freak tornado
7, 8, we’re rocking off the chart here (chart here)
Me and you
Let’s raze from coast to coast til lots of flotsam’s spread
You blow like typhoon cyclones when giving head
Just like polaroid picture’s how we shake it
Girl, you know we’re gonna quake it
Debris
Yeah, the quaking’s getting louder at the crest
But soon it’s just a microwave at best
Rattling the ski-ies
Measuring the si-ize
Love is steaming
Shaking up your face right
Loud screaming
Under the covers
Split opening wi-ide
Curse that crimson ti-ide
Oh, your mantle will shake
Down to the core 'til you break
Earthquake sex
Earthquake sex
Ooh-ooh ooh-ooh
(Gonna sway that chandelier, girl)
Earthquake sex
Earthquake sex
Ooh-ooh ooh-ooh
(Hotspot, hotspot.
Gushing from your hotspot, hotspot. Girl)
Cleaving down the middle in a striiiiike-slip
Need some grease before we plug up this wiiiiide split
You should… come and hop ontop of myyyyy dick
Just love the vibration, our love’s well grounded
You’re after some traction when you get pounded
With 6 on the Richter, the fun’s compounded
Feeling this tectonic shift, girl
We begin to sli-ide
Get ready to ri-ide
Love is steaming
Shaking up your plates right
Loud screaming
Under the covers
Both sides now ali-igned
Get ready to gri-ind
Oh, your mantle will shake
Down to the core 'til you break
Earthquake sex
Earthquake sex
Ooh-ooh ooh-ooh
(Gonna sway that chandelier, girl)
Earthquake sex
Earthquake sex
Ooh-ooh ooh-ooh
(Hotspot, hotspot.
Gushing from your hotspot, hotspot. Girl)
Turn on the washing machine, set it to spin
1, 2, 3... sit you on the lid
Hear that sooouuund, vibrating within
What's that smell? Think it must be burning lint
Ten times the reaction, you'll feel the earth swing
Each rumble gets louder, you're nearly bursting
Ooh! Fissure is heating, hot lava squirting
Eruption all up in your rift, girl
Tremors down your thi-igh
Rumbling all ni-ght
Love is steaming
Shaking up the place right
Loud screaming
Under the covers
Open that divi-ide
Trembling insi-ide
Oh, your mantle will shake
Down to the core 'til you break
Earthquake sex
Earthquake sex
Ooh-ooh ooh-ooh
(Gonna sway that chandelier, girl)
Earthquake sex
Earthquake sex
Ooh-ooh ooh-ooh
(Hotspot, hotspot.
Gushing from your hotspot, hotspot. Girl)
Warming up to 2.5 before we go to sleep
Raise it to 4, we're getting naughty (naughty)
Kaboom!
We twirl around the room just like a freak tornado
7, 8, we’re rocking off the chart here (chart here)
Me and you
Let’s raze from coast to coast til lots of flotsam’s spread
You blow like typhoon cyclones when giving head
Just like polaroid picture’s how we shake it
Girl, you know we’re gonna quake it
Debris
Yeah, the quaking’s getting louder at the crest
But soon it’s just a microwave at best
Rattling the ski-ies
Measuring the si-ize
Love is steaming
Shaking up your face right
Loud screaming
Under the covers
Split opening wi-ide
Curse that crimson ti-ide
Oh, your mantle will shake
Down to the core 'til you break
Earthquake sex
Earthquake sex
Ooh-ooh ooh-ooh
(Gonna sway that chandelier, girl)
Earthquake sex
Earthquake sex
Ooh-ooh ooh-ooh
(Hotspot, hotspot.
Gushing from your hotspot, hotspot. Girl)
It's not the size that matters.
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Voting Breakdown
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| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 5 | 5 | 5 |
User Comments
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Good but how the hell did "come and hop ontop of myyyyy dick" make it past the Chucky meater? He must be slacking nowadays
< ! ! ! >
I have no farking idea how you got this through the editors, but it was hilarious. Especially the myyyyy dick line. 5s.
Compared to the content that used to slip by back in the day, I think this was tame enough to warrant a humming nod of approval. :P
The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.
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