The Huff Po never would mention my indiscretion;
Did what Andrew Sullivan said of Todd Palin.
I don't have to resign because I'm not Republican;
I pled guilty, but you paid no attention.

I schtupped my girl, and she liked it!
For three years, I porked my own kid.
I schtupped my girl; she consented.
My plea bargain: incest attempted.
For three years long, angered my wife;
I'm in the dog house for life.
I schtupped my girl, and I'll swear it:
She liked it.

No, I won't be publicly shamed, though I'm held at fault;
Neither will my daughter be named, though she's an adult.
She was my accomplice, as my lawyer did say.
Kinky; I admit this, but I'm not gay!

I schtupped my girl, and she liked it!
Got tired of my wife, so frigid.
I schtupped my girl, my own daughter;
Muddied my kid's downstream water.
She played along, so I'm all right;
Copped a plea in my court fight.
I schtupped my girl: I hit that;
We did that.

Folks say it's wrong to take my own,
Though I waited 'til she was grown.
It's my business; leave me alone!
I'm more open-minded:
Incest is best; I find it so...

I schtupped my girl, and she liked it!
I don't care what your laws forbid.
My daughter, she was sexting me;
We were not punished equally.
Don't like your laws; spare me that hype
Daughter dearest is my type.
I'll schtupp my girl, and she'll like it;
She likes it!