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Song Parodies -> "Sanity Impaired"

Original Song Title:

"Family Affair"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Mary J. Blige

Parody Song Title:

"Sanity Impaired"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Just a little faux-nutball for ya...
Oh-oh
Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh, oh-oh-oh-oh-ooh-ooh-oh-oh
Mmm-mmm
Oh-oh-oh-mmm

I'll wear some satin crocs upon my knob, I've lost my sanity
Truth is: that's bogus, I'm just hopin' that I'm lookin' mad, you see
A little obfuscation to display a loss of sanity
Don't mind my pear jam paintin' on my taint, it's to look mad, you see

Spend my whole day hoppin', is that nuts?
I hope so, a waste of bumps and cuts
If the doctor thinks my brain's alright
Despite the glued-on google eyes (lots of google eyes)
Must look crazy enough, don't you see
Why else would I be rubbin' cheese (oh-ooh-ooh-oh-oh)
On my nipples? You know I abhor
The taste and smell, so I must be mad, dork

I'll run in public spots (very public spots) with nothin' on, I've lost my sanity (ooh-ooh-ooh)
Except that's bogus, simply hopin' I come off as mad, you see
A plan I'm formulatin' to display a loss of sanity (nutter, nutter, nutter)
Hence why I've danced in place for seven days, it's to look mad, you see (ooh-ooh)

What do I have to do here? Stick my hand in hot pie?
I only want you to shut right up and lie
Sure, you're a shrink, you got that oath in mind
But I drive a train invisible, worth somethin', right?
I've been grey cat puntin', over children jumpin'
And licked damn near ev'ry crack in the wall, is that nothin'?
I told you, leave your reservations at the door
And call my shoes-on-hands-wearin' ass mad as a boar

I'll tape a dozen frogs to random dogs, I've lost my sanity
You know it's bogus, don't be blowin' it, want to look mad, you see
Practiced the face I'm makin' to display a loss of sanity (ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh)
And now in mud, I'm caked, feels not too great, it's to look mad, you see

Tell them I'm bananas (loco, I'm loco)
It's the key to my plan, so don't bother (stop)
With all that crap 'bout crossin' a line (mmm-hmm)
Drown that out with this good wine (mmm-mmm-mmm-oh-oh)
I saved this if you declined
And it's not cheap, left that stuff behind (all behind)
And I really mean "behind" (see)
So tight inside my date, it's fine (so fine)
May be fraud? No "may", alright
We could do all the jail time (lock us up, locked up)
But I don't give a damn, cause I (no, I don't)
Need this plan to work out just right (work out perfect)
Or are you simply shocked at my squid hat (cause it wriggles, squishy wriggles)?
Well, okay then, just sign that (mate)

I'll wear my undies on (smelly undies on) my head because I've lost my sanity (lost my sanity)
It's utter bogus, none must know that (yeah-eah-heah-eah-eah-eah-eah-ee-yeah) I'm not really mad, you see (I'm not really mad, you see)
Need your co-operation (mad, you see) to display a loss of sanity (mad, you see)
Ignore the smiley face in bright red paint (ignore it, ignore it, ignore it), it's to look mad, you see
I'll fill my left-most nostril (crammed, you see) with golf balls, I've lost my sanity (at least three golf balls up)
Don't say it's bogus (all I want y'all to do) to those nosin', they must think I'm mad, you see (say I'm mad, I'm mad)
Plan of my own creation to display a (c'mon, c'mon) loss of sanity (c'mon)
Don't mind my (c'mon) need to race your (c'mon) house plants, mate, it's to look mad, you see (oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)
I'll stick pins in my balls to show them all (uh-uh-woo-ooh-ooh-ooh-oh-oh, yeah-eah) I've lost my sanity
Won't know it's bogus, think I'm totally just up and mad, you see (plain up and mad, you see)
They need a demonstration, a display of (I'm mad, you see) loss of sanity (I'm mad, you see)
Hence all the dinner plates (mad, you see, mad, you see, mad, you see, yeah-eah-eah-eah) nailed to my face, it's to look mad, you see
I'll convince ev'ry judge (mad, you see) that I'm pure nuts, I've lost my sanity (c'mon, y'all, mad)
I know it's bogus and I'm hopin' that you'll claim I'm mad, you see (mad, mad, mad, mad, mad, oh-oh-ho-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)
Part of a plan I'm makin' to display a (devious-ass plan) loss of sanity (but I'm still not a blabber)
Can't say what's next, okay (blabber nought, you hear me)? Just need your say that (I need your "okay" sig, yeah-eah-yeah-eah-eah-yeah) I look mad, you see

So why is the original song called "Family Affair" when the lyrics seem to indicate a generic "in da club" scenario?

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.0
How Funny: 4.0
Overall Rating: 4.0

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   3
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User Comments

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Peter Andersson - February 27, 2018 - Report this comment
Love the original song, it's on my "summer running top-form go hard 5000 on track play list". I've wanted a parody it myself, but failed to come up with a coherent idea so far, trying almost drove me mad, glad to see you fared better... oh, wait...

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