[Intro:]
Hell, yeah
You got first world problems, it's true, girl, ey
First world, first world problems

[Verse 1]
Hey man, it's gettin' hard to take ya
Your whiny rants, cause you're a douche
Run out of room inside your fridge, huh?
Can't feel bad for ya, that's the truth
Stop it, stop it, buddy
You're bein' dumb, plea-ease
Sick of the "shitty Wi-fi" nonsense
Wish I could ban it, not just you

[Pre-Chorus:]
Hear all around, people think they've got boulders
On their backs, well metaphorically, but they're just

[Chorus:]
First world problems, just small stuff
You don't have real problems, you just suck
They're just first world problems, not real stuff
You've got first world, first world problems

(All honey I'm off)

[Verse 2:]
Your work blocked YouTube? Just suck it up
Don't care 'bout your subs, that's the truth
You dropped the string of your fresh teabag
Into the cup, man? Well, boo-hoo-oo-oo-oo
Please don't come cry to me
Or act all whingy
When your shower lacks hot water
Don't even bother, don't care, dude

[Pre-Chorus:]
I come around and you're whinin' 'bout Mulder
"Out of character, can't stand it" I say so what?

[Chorus:]
First world problems, please shut up
They're just first world problems, just clam up
You've got first world problems, that's small stuff
They're just first world, first world problems
First world problems, what you've got
You don't have real problems, afraid so, bud
They're just first world problems, no big stuff
You've got first world, first world problems

[Verse 3:]
Said they're not big, uh, not real probs
I'm not denyin' that your problems kinda suck, dude
Your fave song not in the top ten? I'd be pissed too
But what I'm sayin', bro, is the part that I take issue
With is that your tone is far too whiny, so get a clue
Silly silly, sound silly, you do, when whingin'
About the brightness of your iPad or pool cover malfunctions
Not the worst thing when the deli's run out of fennel
Cause even though that sounds crap, you're wastin' your sad emotions
"What's annoyin', I forgot what my gardener's name is"
Funny, to me what's annoyin' is the bullshit that you're sayin'
Read a million tweets like this, dude, and they're all dumb
May have 99 problems but they're first world ones, so what?

[Bridge:]
Ooh-oh-oh (first world, first world problems)
Mmm-mmm-mmm (first world, first world problems)
Still goin', Wow, I could make me a folder (first world, first world problems)

[Pre-Chorus:]
Collectin' the thousand times you've said that you've got (first world, first world problems)
First world problems, I told ya (yeah)

[Chorus:]
They're just first world problems not big stuff (oh, so lame)
You've got first world problems, so shut up (ooh)
They're just first world, first world problems (ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh, buddy)
First world problems, they do suck (yeah, you got)
You got no real problems, just own up (whoa, whoa)
They're just first world, first world problems (oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)
First world problems, such small stuff (he-e-ey)
They're just first world, first world problems (oh-oh-oh-yeah, yeah-eah-eah-eah-eeh-ee)