(Yo man) Yo
(Open up man) What do you want man?
(I had a party at my girl s house)
You wrecked the place!?
(I don't know how I let this happen)
What d you do?
(I ate all her food, you know!) Man...
(I don't know what to do) Say it wasn't you
(Alright..)

Honey came in and she caught me red-handed
She just came home from the store
Picture this I left the fridge half empty
Passed out on the bathroom floor
How could I forget
That I tend to overeat
All this time she was standing there
The fridge was completely empty

How you can grant the woman access to your food
You left a sandwich in there halfway chewed
You better you left her some of the vanilla
Best for you if you don t even tell her
Just as long as you didn t piss off the FDA
You don t have to tell her there was an all night buffet
Unless old Marco puked on her Monet
Make up an excuse for the state of disarray


There was sausage on the counter
"It wasn't me"
Bag of chips on the sofa
"It wasn't me"
Can of coke in the shower
"It wasn't me"
A box of crackers in the bedroom
"It wasn't me"
She saw the popcorn on the table
"It wasn't me"
Saw a burger on the foyer
"It wasn't me"
Heard the flies in the garbage
"It wasn't me"
And Sean was passed out in the attic

Honey came in and she caught me red-handed
She just came home from the store
Picture this I left the fridge half empty
Passed out on the bathroom floor
I had tried to keep her but she
Saw the half eaten Brie
Why should she believe me
when I told her it wasn't me

You must have eaten like a Tyrannosaurus Rex
So keep on talking until she seems perplexed
If you want to you can blame it on your ex
Don t screw it up cause it s hardly complex
It ll be a giveaway if you start to pass gas
Take your time; don t go too fast
It sounds like your gluttony was unsurpassed
Don t try to clean it up
That s just a pain in the ass

There was sausage on the counter
"It wasn't me"
Bag of chips on the sofa
"It wasn't me"
Can of coke in the shower
"It wasn't me"
A box of crackers in the bedroom
"It wasn't me"
She saw the popcorn on the table
"It wasn't me"
Saw a burger on the foyer
"It wasn't me"
Heard the flies in the garbage
"It wasn't me"
And Sean was passed out in the attic

Honey came in and she caught me red-handed
She just came home from the store
Picture this I left the fridge half empty
Passed out on the bathroom floor
How could I forget
That I tend to overeat
All this time she was standing there
The fridge was completely empty

Gonna tell her that I ll go out and restock the drawers
I ll get out the checkbook
And go to all the stores
I know that I can t keep lying like this anymore
Cause if she can t find her goldfish
She ll kick me out the door

Honey came in and she caught me red-handed
She just came home from the store
Picture this I left the fridge half empty
Passed out on the bathroom floor
How could I forget
That I tend to overeat
All this time she was standing there
The fridge was completely empty