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Song Parodies -> "The Last Cut Is The Hardest"
Original Song Title:
"The First Cut Is The Deepest"
Original Performer:
Sheryl Crow
Parody Song Title:
"The Last Cut Is The Hardest"
Parody Written by:
Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd
The Lyrics
Parody SOTM (Song Of The Month) Contests usually have some 20-25 entries, but it's only allowed to vote for 5 of them. Normally I tend to end up with at least a sixth that I really, really don't wanna cut from my final list. Am I alone in this? Probably not!
I cannot tell these submissions apart
'Cos they're funny and clever and smart
And it's taken just all that I had
So if I'll never come to vote again...
Yes, if I'll never vote again it's because...
The last cut is the hardest
S-O-T-M: The last cut is the hardest
When it comes to saying five's better versed
When it comes to judging better or worse
I still want all on my list
Judging hapless on the ones now dismissed
I am sure we're all letting out sighs
So if we'll never come to vote again...
(Sigh)
Maybe we'll never vote again, and it's 'cos...
The last cut is the hardest
S-O-T-M: The last cut is the hardest
When it comes down to the final disperse
When it comes to letting sixes submerse
I feel angst when need to apply
Any form of sudden death on this tie
Shut the door, I am going to cry
Maybe I'll never come to vote again
(Come to vote again, come to vote again)
And if I'll never vote again it's because...
The last cut is the hardest
S-O-T-M: The last cut is the hardest
When it comes to saying how interspersed
When it comes to doing what is coerced
The last cut is the hardest...
Gotta let go...
The last cut is the hardest...
Not another gem!
'Cos they're funny and clever and smart
And it's taken just all that I had
So if I'll never come to vote again...
Yes, if I'll never vote again it's because...
The last cut is the hardest
S-O-T-M: The last cut is the hardest
When it comes to saying five's better versed
When it comes to judging better or worse
I still want all on my list
Judging hapless on the ones now dismissed
I am sure we're all letting out sighs
So if we'll never come to vote again...
(Sigh)
Maybe we'll never vote again, and it's 'cos...
The last cut is the hardest
S-O-T-M: The last cut is the hardest
When it comes down to the final disperse
When it comes to letting sixes submerse
I feel angst when need to apply
Any form of sudden death on this tie
Shut the door, I am going to cry
Maybe I'll never come to vote again
(Come to vote again, come to vote again)
And if I'll never vote again it's because...
The last cut is the hardest
S-O-T-M: The last cut is the hardest
When it comes to saying how interspersed
When it comes to doing what is coerced
The last cut is the hardest...
Gotta let go...
The last cut is the hardest...
Not another gem!
© Peter Andersson. (Footnote: This song has been covered by many artists, so as to add to the irony all other existing versions had to be cut in favour of this one).
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 1 | 2 | 2 | ||||||||
| 5 | 13 | 12 | 12 |
User Comments
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Methinks thou dost preach to the choir, forsooth, 555.
heartfelt
Great idea Peter! ;-)
The last line of the choruses has an extra syllable but I'm guessing you took advantage of Sheryl's pause to fit it in, so that's okay with me. I haven't had a SOTM short list less than 7 thus far, and yeah, making that final cut(s) is difficult.
The last line of the choruses has an extra syllable but I'm guessing you took advantage of Sheryl's pause to fit it in, so that's okay with me. I haven't had a SOTM short list less than 7 thus far, and yeah, making that final cut(s) is difficult.
So true, 555's
Thanks Johnny, Alvin, Red Ant and Larry.
Red Ant: I take it you mean the possible "and" at the beginning of line 3 and 4? I call them possible because a) the lyrics I looked up don't list them and b) it's almost impossible to tell them apart from an "ahh" of the sighing kind that female singers add when they are trying to sing a bit sexy. Sheryl has the kind of voice that does that succesfully so in my humble opinion that makes the "ahh"s optional here and since there's nothing sexy involved with the last cut (unless it's a parody from Arwen) I opted out here. :-)
Red Ant: I take it you mean the possible "and" at the beginning of line 3 and 4? I call them possible because a) the lyrics I looked up don't list them and b) it's almost impossible to tell them apart from an "ahh" of the sighing kind that female singers add when they are trying to sing a bit sexy. Sheryl has the kind of voice that does that succesfully so in my humble opinion that makes the "ahh"s optional here and since there's nothing sexy involved with the last cut (unless it's a parody from Arwen) I opted out here. :-)
That was a nice thought, Peter.
Yes, one we can all surely associate with. Nice idea.
And is that how Ms. Crow felt when she cut Lance Armstrong out of her life? I commend you for your "versed" rhymings and for accurately describing the voter's angst.
This parody just missed the SOTM Top Five. It was pretty good, all fours, but it seemed to me that it was written specifically for the SOTM, and therefore, unfair to reward it that distinct.
Chris: As you can see from the first comments I wrote this very early in the month, and the original thought was that next time I vote in an SOTM I'm gonna place my five votes and then add "and to everyone else I dedicate this parody" and link to this one.
The one I did write with SOTM in mind was www.amiright.com/parody/70s/rainbow2.shtml but it didn't go down as well as I had hoped. And besides, thinking it over made me realise that any song by sexy Sheryl Crow is always the prefered choice over an elaborated fart joke. :-)
The one I did write with SOTM in mind was www.amiright.com/parody/70s/rainbow2.shtml but it didn't go down as well as I had hoped. And besides, thinking it over made me realise that any song by sexy Sheryl Crow is always the prefered choice over an elaborated fart joke. :-)
(SOTM) Can't argue over the pacing for a song that has been covered quite a few times. It certainly reflects my feelings sometimes putting my time in to these competitions that I never win. Anyway 555.
(SOTM) Nice to see you're thinking of us, K1chyd. You're certainly a better sport about it than I am, I'll admit...
Trust me K1, you're not alone in this... It's a bitch to cut anything, and that's exactly why I'm not EMO!
(SOTM) This parody is not just for rabbis. And there will be many painful cuts this month...
SOTM-See the message
(SOTM) Already voted and commented.
(SOTM) yeah, I do feel a bit sorry for that Spaff guy, the way he continually gets cut out like that, so I guess you're right, K1 - 555
[SOTM] I really liked this one. Well-written and enjoyable 555
(SOTM) And why am I never among those final five?! So far this contest I've got a grand total of 5 POINTS. Hopefully I'll do better next time, as my next entry should be more known among the site...
(SOTM) I don't know wtf I was on about with my previous comment regarding the last lines of the choruses (chori?). Just listened to TOS again and they scanned fine as well as the rest of the parody. Good job with the variations too.
:-) I know exactly what you mean, Peter...
(SOTM) A perfect encapsulation of the torture we put ourselves thru every freakin' month, Peter. Nice work. 555
SOTM - Too true. Cutting SOTM entries is hard.
(SOTM) See above!
(SOTM) true
(SOTM) See above!
SOTM...I think you've just nailed my real reason for taking my break at the beginning of the year, K1...voting in these contests is WAY too much work!! Luckily you've made it easy for me on this one...Great job!!
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