Stains, without suds,
Stains, I've got nice duds,
Stains, I like to scrub,

Cuz' bloodstains just wont take the rub,
Hangers, and fabric bleach,
Seem just, out of reach,
Urkle, or maybe Skreech,
Could get another load or maybe each,
Would do better, if they could stand,
To do with another load maybe by hand,
and wetter by the bunch,
If they'd just stop gettin' their lunch,

Stains, without suds,
Stains, there's too much mud,
Stains, it's a lot of crud and spin cycle won't take the rub,
Stains, without suds,
Stains, can't get these nuts,
Stains, I wash the guts outta cordoroys and all the such,

Eustice, and Muriel,
Went to the funeral,
without the Juniper, Lee Cooper is not full of bull,
When this, next load's dry,
Stick a needle in my eye,
And if you throw in some dye,
It'll come out clean and you won't know why,

Stains, without mud,
Stains, there's lots of blood,
Stains, there's all this rub-bing off on gloves,