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Song Parodies -> "If I Could Speak Girl"

Original Song Title:

"If I Ruled The World"

Original Performer:

Big Time Rush

Parody Song Title:

"If I Could Speak Girl"

Parody Written by:

Blaydeman

The Lyrics

What would that be like?
Intro: Ya know it’s your boy Blaydeman you see
With funny stuff

Verse 1: If I could speak girl
I’d call all my honeys, just pick one and go steady
If I could speak girl
Every spouse that’s preparing could choose things for weddings
I’d break all the borders down
Better contact sounds
If I could speak girl, I’d never frown

Hook: So every fellow read up (up), up (up)
Learn how to speak
Show sympathy when they’re on their “bad week”
Shut up (up), up (up), or they might shriek
Saying “Hell no! Hell no! Hell no!”
Up (up), up (up), up off butt cheeks
Give them a card or you’re up the creek
All these fe-males, with geni-tales
Won’t say, “Hell no!”
If I could speak girl

Chorus: I would use it, use it all the time
Use it, use it, use it avoid fights
(If I could speak girl)
I would use it, use it all the time
Use it, use it, use it avoid fights

Verse 2: This could change the world
I’d never have to worry about understanding buzz
Cuz I would speak girl
And I could watch Football like every man does
We’d throw every dish of china yes, cuz
They are useless
Then me and my girl would go have sex

Hook: So every homey just go (go), go (go)
Read a Cosmo
Buy them a rose and a tub of Fro-Yo
Don’t blow (blow), blow (blow), shopping for clothes
Just say, “Let’s go! Let’s go! Let’s go!”
Yo (yo), yo (yo), watchin’ her show
Take out the trash and massage her toes
Get all my bros, hoes, and let love grow
Saying’ “Oh whoah!”
If I could speak girl

Chorus: I would use it, use it all the time
Use it, use it, use it avoid fights
(If I could speak girl)
I would use it, use it all the time
Use it, use it, use it avoid fights

Bridge: She’d be beating me at chess
I will make sure they will
Blaydeman knows how losing can make her feel
Matching carpets
Girl, decorate whatever
I ain’t tryna run game
I am tryna be clever
Girl, I will do your thing if you’d do my thing
Learning a hundred words an seconds
That’s called “compromising”
And if my girl ever find out I’m a posers
She’ll tell me, “Hey Mr. Ladies’ Man, it’s over!”

Hey! Oh no!
Wish I could speak girl!

Hook: Just everybody shut up (up), up (up)
Just stop talking
It is no use, she still keeps on nagging
Enough (‘nough), ‘nough (‘nough), ‘nough of chick speak
They say, “Hell no! Hell no! Hell no!”
What? (what?), What? (what?), What could it be?
Is what they want some sincerity?
To all their B’s, T’s, and woman’s needs
I say, “Hell no!”
If I could speak girl

Chorus: I would use it, use it all the time
Use it, use it, use it avoid fights
(If I could speak girl)
I would use it, use it all the time
Use it, use it, use it avoid fights
(If I could speak girl)

Chorus: I would use it, use it all the time
Use it, use it, use it avoid fights
I would use it, use it all the time
Use it, use it, use it avoid fights
(If I could speak girl)

Outro: I would use it, use it all the time
Use it, use it, use it avoid fights
I would use it, use it all the time
Use it, use it, use it avoid fights
If I could speak girl…
June 5, 2012. Please rate and COMMENT! :)

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 4.3
Overall Rating: 4.0

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
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 2   0
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 1
 
 3   0
 1
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 4   1
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 5   2
 2
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User Comments

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Porfle Popnecker - June 06, 2012 - Report this comment
You could hire yourself out as a translator!

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