See the rain, back again
Hear those little drops?
Can’t I just sing inside, wait until it stops?
Look at that, glass is broken, could’ve been bad
Cut my finger open
Might cut it open

That’s the way it goes when you’re making videos
An artist knows just how to please
It’s time for the next shot.. he wants me to do what?
Well if it sells my CDs….

I will look really pained for you
Have this love song explained for you
Pull this piano along with rope
Through rush-hour traffic and live (I hope)… Ohhhhh
Yeah I might go real berserk
And pretend I’m a creepy jerk
I suffer well for my art, babe
But hey – at least it’s work…. Oh woah woooaaah wooaaahhh….

Some rude tattooed dude
Giving me some bull
I think he wants my piano but he don’t look musical
He’s scary, I’m wary, pick up what I dropped
It’s a picture of you I think it’s been Photoshopped

Please cut me some slack this piano hurts my back
I’ve got a backing track anyway
Producer said I still should push it up this hill
Think I’ll be docking his pay

‘Cause I’m taking a risk for you
I might get a slipped disc for you
Pulling this thing in the rain for you
I’m knackered and I’m in pain for you… Ooooohhhh
I will get all sore and stiff
In a cheap suit and Elvis quiff
And when I’m done I’ll be sweaty
I’m really gonna whiff….

Well I made it to your front door
Ooohh – some guy is already there!
I think I’ve seen him somewhere be-fore
‘Cause he had a small role in Baywatch I swear!

I’ve dragged this piece of crap round all day for you!
Have to drag it away now too
I wore this damn stupid hat for you
I looked a serious prat for you… Ooooohhhh
So now I won't ‘share the wealth’
You can buy my CD yourself!
I’ve got a hernia, baby -
That’s not good for my health!

Yeah, this piano’s shit…
I’ll break it up a bit…
Ooooh…. That’s what I call a ‘hit’
Ohh yeah yeaaahhh yeahhh….