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Song Parodies -> "The Fighter"

Original Song Title:

"The Writer"

Original Performer:

Ellie Goulding

Parody Song Title:

"The Fighter"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

If it's so easy to punch for a living, why don't you try it, Mr. Manager Man?
A life full of violence where ev'rything hurts
Numb to all the pain, hurt that's observed
But inside is diff'rent because that's where you'll see
Rage at the asshole who's done this to me
You're my promoter or whatever you're called
Too many red gloves direct to the skull
Toll on the body, outside and within
Yet you're insisting a break's best skipped
But I've got a plan

Why don't you step in that ring and punch them in my place?
Why don't you be the fighter while I count the cash I make?
Since you love to suggest that my job is such a cinch
So if it's not all that hard, won't you sub in for me?

You always tell me that all my fist swings
Are easy as pie, a child could do those things
So it'll be fine, I put my faith in you
Same weight division, I think that's true
If not, same base plan

Why don't you step in that ring and get punched in the face?
Why don't you be the fighter while I lounge around backstage?
Ev'ry day you suggest that a monkey could do this
I'm sure that you're 'bout as smart, go and sub in for me

Your face, my face, does it matter who's gets punched in?
Your place, my place, does it matter where we clock in?
Your fate, my fate, does it matter who does what shit?
Your state, my state, does it matter?

Why don't you step in that ring and eat floor ev'ry day (just eat floor ev'ry day)?
Why don't you be the fighter and I yell right in your face (yell right into your face)?
Sick of how you suggest any moron could do this
Obvious joke, it's as harsh as the way you treat me
Why don't you step in that ring? Since it's not like I train (whoa-oh-oh)
Why don't you be the fighter? I'm sure that you'll be okay (whoa-oh-oh)
A dumb thing to suggest ev'ry day that I suck shit
If when I call out your bluff, you back down so easy

I wonder how much one would need to tweak this to make it about the spellcaster-martial divide in DnD.

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