Why are you in my house right now? Man, I'm so sick of these trespassers
You need to get your arse out now, sick of dealin' with these trespassers

I just don't get it, I'm sure it's true
I locked the doors up, the windows too
But ev'ry other day when it's time for me to rest
I turn the corner and I find a stranger on my bed (oh-oh)
I struggle to contain (oh-oh) the violence in my veins (oh-oh)
Some asshole's in my place (oh-oh)

Why are you in my house right now? Man, I'm so sick of these trespassers
Didn't even wipe your feet now, sick of dealin' with these trespassers
It wouldn't matter if you were my buddy, all my doors were shut, they were shut
That means nobody is home, you better leave until I rock up, I rock up
But you're in my house right now and I'm not that fond of trespassers

Another wrinkle that hurts me hard:
You're not here to rob, murder or just paint dicks on my art (oh-oh)
These people in my place (oh-oh) are here to take my cake (oh-oh)
And then make toast, it's crazed (oh-oh)

That's why you're in my house right now? Man, I'm so sick of these trespassers
Surely you've got your own cake now, there's no need to be a trespasser
I'd never pull this, no matter how hungry 'cause I'm not a dunce, not a dunce
I wanna call this a case of the munchies but you've done too much, done too much
For me to laugh this off now, said I'm not that fond of trespassers

Not that I'm down for real theft now
For full disclosure (ha, ha, ha, ha-ah)
But this is nuts, it ain't just one
Who's comin' over (ha, ha, ha, ha-ah)
What about my house right now that makes it good prey for trespassers?
Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-oh, yeah
And why aren't they all clothed right now? Really don't like naked trespassers
Damn it, oh-oh, please keep on your clothes

Don't wanna see your dong right now, who would do that as a trespasser?
Oh-ooh-whoa-oh
Gotta go bleach my eyeballs now before I chase out this trespasser
Handy that to do that, I don't have to see, can just shout a ton, shout a ton
Can just stare at your footprints from the chimney, that explains a bunch, a whole bunch
Need to take that thing out now, should cut down on all the trespassers