-> "Crypto Store"
Original Song Title:
"Candy Store"
Original Performer:
Heathers the Musical
Parody Song Title:
"Crypto Store"
Parody Written by:
Anna the Flutist
The Lyrics
H. CHANDLER:
Are we gonna have a problem?
You got a bone to pick?
You’ve come so far,
Why now do you think Bitcoin’s just a trick?
I’d normally slap your face off,
If that’s what you prefer
But I’m feeling nice.
Here’s some advice.
Listen up, nocoiner!
H. DUKE & H. MCNAMARA:
I like!
H. CHANDLER:
Runnin’ hot
Minin’ stuff they cannot
H. DUKE & H. MCNAMARA:
I like!
H. CHANDLER:
Hashin’ hard
Loadin’ my Ether card
H. DUKE & H. MCNAMARA:
I like!
H. CHANDLER:
Buying this
Trading that
Hit or miss
H. DUKE & H. MCNAMARA:
I like!
H. CHANDLER:
Promo codes
HEATHERS:
Kickin’ laws in the nose!
H. CHANDLER:
If you lack the balls
You can watch the fall,
Let inflation get to your stash.
H. DUKE & H. MCNAMARA:
Woah!
H. CHANDLER:
Or you could come fly
There’s no way you’ll die
When you’re holding onto crypto cash.
HEATHERS:
Woah! Woah! Woah!
Honey, whatchu waitin’ for?
Welcome to my crypto store
It’s time for you to prove
You’re not a noobie anymore
Then step into my crypto store
H. CHANDLER & H. MCNAMARA:
Solve blocks
H. DUKE:
Pay it out
Proof of work
H. MCNAMARA:
With no doubt
HEATHERS:
All you
H. DUKE:
Have to do
H. CHANDLER:
Watch it go to the moon.
HEATHERS:
Fiat's
H. MCNAMARA:
Not your friend
I can tell it will end.
HEATHERS:
It has
H. MCNAMARA:
Gone its range
HEATHERS:
Money should have a change!
H. MCNAMARA:
‘Course to have the thrill
Fine! Go pay with bills
Panic selling when you should hodl.
HEATHERS:
Woah!
H. MCNAMARA:
Or fiat can die
H. DUKE:
Bitcoin price is high
H. CHANDLER:
Crypto’s soaring and it’s big and bold!
HEATHERS:
Woah! Woah! Woah!
Honey, whatchu waitin’ for?
Welcome to my crypto store
You just gotta prove
You’re not a skeptic anymore
Then step into my crypto store
H. CHANDLER:
You can join the team
H. DUKE & H. MCNAMARA:
Or you can trudge and moan
H. CHANDLER:
You can live your dream
H. DUKE & H. MCNAMARA:
Or you can work alone
H. CHANDLER:
You can fly with eagles
HEATHERS:
Or if you prefer
H. CHANDLER:
Keep on doubting me
H. DUKE & H. MCNAMARA:
And end up like her!
MARTHA:
Veronica, look!
Ram sold me this really obscure altcoin from an Ethereum fork.
This proves he’s a trustworthy trader.
VERONICA:
Color me bullish.
MARTHA:
I’m gonna be rich!
H. DUKE:
Woah!
Honey, whachu waiting fo—
H. Chandler:
SHUT UP HEATHER
Step into my cryp-to— store Oooh woah!
H. DUKE & H. MCNAMARA:
Time for you to prove
You’re not a holdout anymore
HEATHERS:
Then step into my crypto store
It’s my crypto store
It’s my crypto
It’s my crypto store
It’s my crypto
It’s my crypto store
Your Vote & Comment Counts
The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they
appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to
leave a comment below about this parody.
|
|
Voting Results
|
Pacing: | 5.0 | |
How Funny: | 5.0 | |
Overall Rating: | 5.0 | |
|
Total Votes: | 4 |
|
Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| | | | Pacing | | | How Funny | | | Overall Rating | |
| 1 | | 0 | |
| 0 | |
| 0 | |
|
| 2 | | 0 | |
| 0 | |
| 0 | |
|
| 3 | | 0 | |
| 0 | |
| 0 | |
|
| 4 | | 0 | |
| 0 | |
| 0 | |
|
| 5 | | 4 | |
| 4 | |
| 4 | |
|