Spoken:
We went away, Miami bound
His spine bothered him every night
And when the Advil wore off
He felt things that weren't very nice

My boyfriend's back is giving him some trouble
(Oy, oy, oy, oy—my boyfriend's back)
Goes to the doctor, bent over double
(Oy, oy, oy, oy—my boyfriend's back)
He stood straight in life, but now that's not true
(Oy, oy, oy, oy—my boyfriend's back)
He's in pain, now I'm feeling blue
(Oy, oy, oy, oy—my boyfriend's back)

Hey, he's got apendicidis
Oy, and other things besides this

Heart's so bad, he's almost flatlined
(Oy, oy, oy, oy—my boyfriend's back)
Needs Epsom Salt so his feet can feel fine
(Oy, oy, oy, oy—my boyfriend's back)
He'll feel sorry he was ever born
(Oy, oy, oy, oy—my boyfriend's back)
Cause his pill's wearing off, and it's awful strong
(Oy, oy, oy, oy—my boyfriend's back)

Hey, he's careful what he's eatin'
Cause his ulcer is a bleadin'

I can hear his pitiful cries wahoo, wahoo,
Cause his prostate's twice a normal one's size wahoo
Vey iz mir*!
My boyfriend's back is giving him sensations
(Oy, oy, oy, oy—my boyfriend's back)
But not as bad as his flatuation
(Oy, oy, oy, oy—my boyfriend's back)
Yeah, my boyfriend's back (etc. till fade)