The Lyrics
OBAMA::
"Spend and tax: we'll elect and re-elect forever" [1]
Is it wise? Foolish words! We'll give everything to you
Naught you need to do
Ever!
BOEHNY:
Those bucks gushing so free; panacea!
What a blight! Money, bleed? Diarrhea!
OBAMA:
Money, money...
BOEHNY:
Us, you too; it's the only way we know
Buy votes with cash flow, whoopee!
OBAMA:
All the world owns us, from spending spree
[grandiose flourish, as in OS, then somber words from the heart]
TOMMY TURTLE:
Default, default
The only way to halt
Us owing what we ne'er can repay
No gold in vault [2]
Both Left and Right assault [L1]
Each postpones final 'wreck'-on-ing day [L2]
Repay? In prayer, must have been kneeling
A miracle would happen
Some magic cure for plight
And here we are
All hosting Chinese flag with Red Star
Not bright!
TREASURY SECRETARY TIMOTHY GEITNER'S VOICE [from his office, offstage]
Obama!
OBAMA (whispered)
We cannot pay. Deal quickly!
BOEHNY [spoken]
Our grandkids, raid
OBAMA [spoken]
Seize! [3]
BOEHNY [dissing him]
Good fight!
OBAMA
Boehner, coach us.
BOEHNY
I'd love to
OBAMA
Cripes, man, hurry!
Mate, push the deal through!
GEITNER:
Tuesday! [4]
OBAMA
One more suicidal sop to toss Wall Street
Nancy Pelosi's [5]
BOEHNY:
All thin air
OBAMA
It's closing in: 2012.
BOEHNY:
Mess.
OBAMA
Hand, sleight? [6]
BOEHNY
Won't bite. [7]
OBAMA (calling after him)
Boehny!
BOEHNY:
'Sup?
OBAMA
Can you drum up a bit more?
BOEHNY
Gee....
OBAMA
Boehny!
What does TT stand for?
BOEHNY
Balance [8]
OBAMA:
No more borrow, John-Boehn?
BOEHNY
No more borrow, Obama
TOMMY TURTLE [resume singing]
Serves right: bind, tight
Fits well. Pols did not deem:
T's/FG's
Foresight! [9] [L3}
[1] A 1938 New York Times report quoted President Franklin D. Roosevelt's trusted advisor Harry Hopkins as describing Roosevelt's New Deal by saying: 'We will spend and spend, and tax and tax, and elect and elect."
[2] At the end of World War II, the US held about 60% of the world's gold reserves. By 1970, the US was down to 16% of the world's reserves. (See the footnotes in the parody linked in the last line of this parody.) In 2009, it was 6%. By now, I think the coins a few of us have stashed away are about it.
[3] Or to put it in the current euphemism, "increase revenues". Is that somehow different from "raising taxes"? If raising taxes is your policy, *own* it, Dudes!
[4] I. e., August 2, 2011, because the Doomsdate (not! - keep reading) is Wednesday, August 3, 2011, one week from today.
[5] Might as well work in as many of the players as possible, and it was *such* a perfect sub for TOS "Madam Lucia's" (same for the line above it). Or are such things even noticed any more? ... been away for a while.
[6] I. e. the sleight-of-hand juggling of the books that vastly UNDERSTATES both the annual deficit and the total national debt, by not counting what are called "unfunded future liabilities", by pretending that there actually is some sort of Social Security "trust fund" (hah!), etc., etc.
[7] The would-be lenders to the US Gov aren't falling for that any more ("won't bite" at that dangled bait), as evidenced by the predictions of all three financial rating agencies (Moody's, Standard & Poor's, Fitch's) that the US's top-notch AAA credit rating will likely be downgraded soon for the first time ever, *even if a deal is reached*, because of the obvious and repeated inability of the Gov to live within its (our) means.
[8] Not "balance" as in "let's balance spending cuts with tax increases", but as in doing what I, you, and every other individual and family in the world must do if it is to survive and prosper: BALANCE THE BUDGET. And run some surpluses, so that this $14 trillion debt (that's $45,000,00 per person for every man, woman, and child in the US) can at last start to be paid off.
[9[ As explained in the parody linked there, gold is real money, and paper is pretend-money. When that parody was written, on December 8, 2009, it took $1123 of paper money to buy one ounce of gold. As this is written, with Asian markets open, it takes between $1620 and $1625 paper dollars to buy one ounce of gold. That is an increase of about 44% in less than twenty months, or an increase of about 26% per year. That's how fast your paper money is falling in value.
Yes, this is a we-told-you-so. Yes, it's richly deserved.
WHAT EXACTLY IS DEFAULT?
It is *not* the lying scare tactics being thrown at you. I will speak very slowly, in words of no more than two sylla-bles (ok, "syllables" is three ;)
"Default does *not* mean not being able to pay *any* of your bills. It means not being able to pay *all* of them.
Pause and let that sink in, before we hold up the lies to the light of truth. (sometimes using three syllables)
Consider the many families who have lost their homes to foreclosure. Did they also stop eating? Surely there were a few extreme cases, but in most, those who had borrowed money that they could not repay (cough) , sometimes after borrowing more money one or several times ("raising their debt ceilings"), moved into cheaper rental housing, and kept on buying groceries, electric power, IPhones™, and the other necessities of life.
The POTUS tells you he will stop Social Security, Medicare, and military pay and pensions first. OK, but *that's his choice". He could -- and would, *trust me* -- pay those *first* from whatever money is available, and also pay the interest payments on the current debt. We can pay some of our bills, but we can't pay all of them.
Who gets cut? Well, the seventy-three gazillion Federal bureaucrats whose job it is to micromanage our lives. Don't just "not pay" them; fire them. And the entire IRS, the least cost-effective tax of all (cost of collection vs. amount collected).
This is why default would be great: We would *have* to make the cuts that all pols have been too cowardly to make for too many years.
Interest rates would rise, making it more expensive for the Gov to borrow money? Good. It *should* be expensive for the Gov to borrow money, so that they'll be less likely to do it, or at least, we'll tolerate it less. The Gov has been living in a fantasy land of unrealistically-low interest rates for some years now,. thanks to the Federal Reserve 'Board's "quantitative easing" (In English: Print more money, and lend it to the Treasury at rates that are near *zero* for short-term obligations.)
Nothing else will wake up the American people, and until they wake up, the pols will never change.