Here's my story it's odd but true
About a seemingly serious Jew
No "Mazel Tov" 'cause she ran around
With every single goy in town.

Ah, I should have known it from the pork in her cart
The girl would leave me in the Kosher mart
Moses told our people what I'm telling you:
"Keep away from the Orthodox Jew."

She drinks our wine and bakes unleavened bread
Takes the trouble to cover her head
But flirts with the cantor in the synagogue pew
Ah-keep away from that Orthodox Jew

The Jew likes to travel 'round
Work on Friday when the sun's gone down
King David put his people wise:
"The Jew goes out with all the goys."
Here's a lesson from the Talmud in the Book of Job:
She keeps it hidden beneath that robe
But ask all the chosen that you ever knew, they'll tell ya'
"Keep away from the Orthodox Jew"

The Jew likes to travel round
Work on Friday when the sun's gone down
King David put his people wise:
"The Jew goes out with all the goys."
Here's a lesson from the Talmud in the Book of Job
She keeps it hidden beneath that robe
But ask all the chosen that you ever knew, they'll tell ya'
"Keep away from the Orthodox Jew."