-> "Mr. Molar Guy"
Original Song Title:
"American Pie"
Parody Song Title:
"Mr. Molar Guy"
Parody Written by:
Alex Silver
The Lyrics
A long long time ago
I still can remember
When I didn't know about moles at all
I did chemistry equations dry
I couldn't do them, but I tried
They proved to be my downfall
But then our teacher she told me
About something to set me free
A little thing called a mole
That would get me to my goal
It's like a dozen or a pair
at this we all pulled our hair
But then she filled our mental hole
About our friend the mole
So hi, hi mister molar guy
Do some equations on occasion
Or at least we'll try
And we'll use some moles everywhere they apply
And our test scores, they'll be really high
Our test scores will be really high
"First thing to learn," she said,
"First thing in your little heads"
A number so big it's absurd
Named after Mr. Avogadro
Starts off with a six point oh
Ends with a two times ten to the twenty-third
Just use that factor label method
That is all that she said
The number of representative particles
A really large amount of particles
We all made our moles real
Gave us all a better feel
And that made us able to deal
With our friend the mole
So hi, hi mister molar guy
Do some equations on occasion
Or at least we'll try
And we'll use some moles everywhere they apply
And our test scores, they'll be really high
Our test scores will be really high
Next it was time for molar mass
This test is one that we'd all pass
Just look on that periodic table
It's all based off of carbon, yeah
It shows how much a mole weighs, yeah
In chemistry we're now enabled
And so we converted them to each other
One equation after another
Moles to mass to particles
Again with all those particles
And we thought that we were all done
"Oh no," said teacher, "You've just begun
"You're going to have a lot more fun,
With our friend the mole"
She started singin'
Hi, hi mister molar guy
Do some equations on occasion
Or at least we'll try
And we'll use some moles everywhere they apply
And our test scores, they'll be really high
Our test scores will be really high
She told us about analytical chemists
And how they based their premise
Off of moles and all that stuff
Then she told us how to do it
Empirical formulas are the shiznit
If you don't find them too rough
You gotta use the ratios of the reactants
An atom's way smaller than an ant
Then you can find use the molar mass
And find the molecular formula last
"Is that all there is to chemistry?" we asked
"Nope," she said, "there's stoichiometry"
"Oh no," moaned the class, "more chemistry?"
"With our friend the mole?"
So hi, hi mister molar guy
Do some equations on occasion
Or at least we'll try
And we'll use some moles everywhere they apply
And our test scores, they'll be really high
Our test scores will be really high
Stoichiometry wasn't all that bad
Doing it didn't make us sad
Just mass to mole to mole to mass
Using coefficients wisely
Carabell, she praised us highly
We were starting to kickbutt
We dabbled a little in hydrates
We thought those were really great
Boil off that excess H2O
Let that compound's true colors show
We looked a little at percent yield
Actual over theoretical yield
Was there more? Her lips were sealed
About our friend the mole.
She started singing hi, hi mister molar guy
Do some equations on occasion
Or at least we'll try
And we'll use some moles everywhere they apply
And our test scores, they'll be really high
Our test scores will be really high
Finally teacher told us the news
There was no more about moles, we were through
We had learned all we could
But then a smile cracked on her face
The memory of the mole shouldn't be erased
There's something else we should do
"We're not done with chemistry today,
I've just sent you on your merry way.
There's still more to do.
We're far from through!"
And the class all groaned with smiles on
"Cause we could see a new day had dawned
And we'd have more fun now that we're done
With our friend the mole
And we started singin'
Hi, hi mister molar guy
Do some equations on occasion
Or at least we'll try
And we'll use some moles everywhere they apply
And our test scores, they'll be really high
Our test scores will be really high
Hi, hi mister molar guy
Do some equations on occasion
Or at least we'll try
And we'll use some moles everywhere they apply
And our test scores, they'll be really high
Our test scores will be really high
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Voting Results
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Pacing: | 2.8 | |
How Funny: | 3.4 | |
Overall Rating: | 3.6 | |
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Total Votes: | 5 |
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