Nothing that I'd rather do
Can't pry my eyes from view
Love television so much
Cartoons and westerns and such
Don't say it will make me blind
TV just makes me feel alive
New shows and the reruns, too
Can't pry my eyes from view

Very little that I care
Don't have any time to share
But I found a prize unique
See Wonka's factory next week
Guess I'll miss "Deal Or No Deal"
The "Star Trek" marathon, too
Can't pry my eyes from view

I love my TV!
I can watch it all night!
I need the TV
Everything is all right
Just call me Tevee
Spelled the phonetic way
I love my TV
But things I saw today
Better than TV
All those other kids, gay
I'll get that big prize, baby...
Charlie's through, too

This is too good to be true
Space Age TV in view
It's Wonkavision to touch
Aired chocolate from that small hutch
"I wanna go on that ride"
"Flip the switch," I then cried
Now what did that camera do?
Shrunk down less than size 2!

Oh blast that TV!
This trip's messed up, alright!
Wonka, your TV
You gave my mom a fright
A Two-Inch Tevee
Is what I am today

Oh damn that TV!
It brought me down today
That lousy TV, I guess I now have paid...