Song Parodies -> "'ayn-al-Ba'ath-a-al Shi'a"

Original Song Title:

"In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida"

^(MP3)

Original Performer:

"'ayn-al-Ba'ath-a-al Shi'a"

Parody Written by:

The Lyrics

In our backk and forths about our old friend, the unvoiced glottal stop, we happened on a new sahib, the Arabic pharyngeal fricative, called the 'ayn. This consonant, one of the most hideous noises to ever disgrace the human voicebox, is created by tensing your vocal chords as if you are experiencing actual pain. For example if you wanted to say the Arabic word "with", which is ma' (مع) properly, practice saying the word "Ma" while stepping barefoot on a Lego Block!! And you though a glottal stop sounded awful!..... Now then, the trick in the parody is that every Arabic word with a dash is an "ayn" word, producing a parody that no English speaker could possible sing without straining the total fricative out of his pharynx

'ayn-al-Ba'ath-ع-al Shi'a, Sunnis
Dont you know that they love you
'ayn-al Isma'iliyyah, Shi'ites
Dont you know that 'Alawites are brutes
'ah wont you tense your chords
Though you're not inclined
'ah wont you blow some air
And a make the 'ain
Please say the '-'-'-'-'-'-'-ain!!!!

'ayn-a-'Abdul-'Aziza, Sa'udis
Dont you know I'll Wahhab you
'ayn-al Qa'idah-'irhab*, 'Umar
Dont you know that for Allah you slew
'ah wont you sound an "h"
To prepare your mind
'ah wont you add your voice
And a make the 'ayn, 'ayn 'ayn 'ayn, 'ayn
Please, say the '-'-'-'-'-'-'ayn!!

(Cue 14-minute tape of camels groaning which is a fairly close approximation of the sound of an "ayn")

'ayn-a-Ka'aba-Kameleon, 'Arabs
Dont you know that I've punned you
ayn-a-'aroosah-A'ishah, Nebbi
Dont you know that she always loved you
'ah wont you sound an "ah"
Like most humankind
'ah wont you stomp a tack
Now you've said the ay-yi-yi-yi-yi-yine!!
Please say the ع-ع-ع-ع-ع-ayn!!

* 'irhab -- terror .... 'aroosah A'ishah -- bride A'ishah

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CML - January 18, 2018 - Report this comment

'ayn-al retentive linguistic notes: The name Omar actual starts with this consonant and the vowel "u". The pharyngeal fricativication attendant to the articulation of the 'ayn (whatever the fricative that means) distorts the u vowel into "o". Ergo the best way to practice pronouncing the first vowel properly is to step on Lego block barefooted just before you say -- 'Umar God, that hurts!! ....... Nobody in America pronounces Sau'di correctly. It's actually a 3-syllable word that sounds very close to "Seh-HOAD-dee", but at the point you are about to say the "h", you activate your vocal chords. It goes without saying that this should only be attempted under the tutelage of a licensed Arabic linguist; otherwise you could do irreparable damage to your vocal chords

Rob Arndt - January 18, 2018 - Report this comment

It's all Greek to me, but 555 anyway!

Funny - January 18, 2018 - Report this comment

https://youtu.be/pa71JfWvY0M

JAB - January 18, 2018 - Report this comment

Scholarly, literate. Funny!

CML - January 18, 2018 - Report this comment

Thanks JAB. Ya know, if you change the first line a tiny bit, to "In al Ba'atha al Shi'a, Sunnis", it would translate to, "Lo, the rebirth of Shi'ism, Sunnis" (lol) -- which come to think of it, was a hit for 'Iraq Ba'atterfly ..... and yes, the word 'Iraq does start with an "ayn" in Arabic

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