Hobbits from Shire
Ventured through abyss
Must have gone mental
Trust teenagers with this
Brown paper packaging
Covers the ring
Now we must choose
The fate of this thing

Suaron's Cronies
He must have to duel
Ringwairths
And Nazguls
And those Orced Fools
When he almost died
By one simple sting
Should we entrust him with our precious ring?

"What are your guesses?
Should we send these trashes?"

No offence fellas
But you lack defenses
So throw in the archer
And that loser Gimili
This is the crew to dispose of the ring

Off to Mordor
Dump in the ring
And then that's that
This novel ain't simply the Lord of the Wings
You'll get aching heels, too bad

Pack up your clothes
And bid us, "Good Riddance"
That ring is sexy
But don't get too smitten
Big hefty weaponry
Fights off bad things
This you must do to get rid of the ring

Forecast: Snow Flurries
And Rain blood from duels
So we'll supply you with horses and mules
Elvish cat fighting which Aragorn swings
Those are the perks to put up with the ring

When Pippin wears dresses
And Merry's strange rashes
Gimili called Dopey
For his special stashes
Frodo keeps laughing
Straightjacket with strings
We've spent too long with the f*cking ring!!!

"Are we there yet?!"
Legolass screams
"Frodo's going mad"
We fought 50 battles to get rid of this ring
And we're still at Elrond's pad