-> "Summer Whine"
Original Song Title:
"Summer Wine"
Parody Song Title:
"Summer Whine"
The Lyrics
FG:
Raw; very weary: temp in range of 100s, swings
What bummer! Find- -ing smelly reruns TV brings
TT:
I tossed around to Fiddlegirl: some jingles, new
So long, that I was lonely; panged for lusty "do"
She said, "The silly, spurn; I'm ready: "twist of lime"
"I need a month or two: hammock time
"Ohh-oh-oh, fun: recline"
FG:
Mitt Romney's parries sent; arrange: dismiss the King?
By summer time, I'm leery: mud that campaigns fling [1]
Took all of '12, you curs, to schlep your mass of slime
Won't you please give to us... *some* free time?
Ohhh-oh, dumb-free time
TT:
I eye beach bevy; tanned thighs/hips raise wooden peak
My tel'scope set up; shot: 300 line'ar feet
She dissed; abjured T. and his uncongenial spy'n'
And then she heaved at me: sour scummy brine [P]
Ohh-oh-oh, Son, I'm blind!
FG:
Make merry; cherries popped; an angel's blissful thong:
That bum of mine: unpeeling maids, all season long
Shake off that syph' incurred, and yelp at cat's o' nine
Before I'll give to you some of mine
Mmm-mm, blubber, swine!
TT:
Sun-light: stoke up: storm; thunder; lightning fright'ning eyes [2]
Cold's shivers spurned here; hurricane stats hit their highs [3]
It took my shingled spars: this squall, so, squallor: mine [4]
And live encavin'; poor; Thor's summer crime [5]
Ohh-oh-oh, plumber time!
FG:
Tornadoes, 'fraid? Ok- da*n! Great Plains, US, will bring [6]
My cellar hide-y--hole will save us from these stings
Slake off! A blizzard's "Brr's" would def' surpass this clime
I'm tired of livin' through (fry!) summertime
BOTH:
Oyy-vay, summer: whine!
[1] Yes, *both* sides have definitely crossed the line at times. Happy?
[P] Pacing Cops: Good thing that dictionaries allow the one-syl pronunciation of "sour", eh?
[2] Intense daytime heating of any humid area causes hot, moist air to rise, leading to thunderclouds and storms.
(Further meteorological detail available on request.)
[3] The North Atlantic hurricane season reaches a peak in late summer, roughly mid-August to the end of September or so. Sharpest spike, statistically, is right around September 10-15th. (Beware the Ides of Sep!)
[4] Using "spar" (strong wooden beam or pole) as supporting the roof structure and decking, which might be shingled. Worst hurricanes have taken off not just the covering (shingles or whatever) and decking, but the trusses or other structural supports as well.
[5] "Thor" -- Norse god of thunder, lightning, and storms, among other talents.
UPDATE: This parody was completed before Tropical Storm Isaac was recognized as a possible threat to Florida and the GOP Convention in Tampa. (It's like ESPN! ;)
[6] (Pronouncing "Ok-' as it actually is: the first syllable of "Oklahoma".
(No plugs of parodies of that OS -- FG wouldn't let TT.)
(Readers: "All hail FG!")
(FG: "Hail"? Oh, hail, no!" ;)
Those who live near the warm waters of the southern North Atlantic or the Gulf of Mexico are at risk for hurricanes. Farther inland, in the Central US, those warm, moist Gulf breezes and hot, dry breezes from the Desert Southwest and Mexico often collide with cool, dry air masses coming down from the interior of Canada, causing violent storms and tornadoes. This area, consisting mostly of Oklahoma, Kansas (remember Dorothy and Oz?), and Nebraska, is known informally as "Tornado Alley". There is a pretty good diagram of both geography and mechanism linked in the outro.
Tornadoes in the Alley tend to be more severe than in other areas, and the US has more tornadoes than any other country.
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Voting Results
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Pacing: | 4.9 | |
How Funny: | 4.7 | |
Overall Rating: | 4.7 | |
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Total Votes: | 12 |
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Voting Breakdown
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| 5 | | 11 | |
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