All my bags are packed, I’m ready to soar.
Each one will cost me twenty five more.
To say this will be fun would be a lie.

Two hour line at security,
And I’ve misplaced my photo I.D.
Already I’m so stressed out I could cry.

So kick me and hassle me
‘cause my flight won’t wait for me.
Hold me so I can’t make gate on time.

I’m grievin’ on a jet place
And it’s a big colossal pain.
Oh, babe, I hate to fly.

There’s so many things they’ve overlooked.
The flight I’m on is overbooked.
My E-ticket, it don’t mean a thing.

Every takeoff now is quite delayed.
Every on board snack has a price to pay.
And I don’t think my bags are under wing.

So kick me and hassle me
‘cause my flight won’t wait for me.
Hold me so I can’t make gate on time.

I’m grievin’ on a jet place
And it’s a big colossal pain.
Oh, babe, I hate to fly.

Now the time has come to land.
To see a runway would sure be grand.
This holding pattern makes me want to cuss.

Dream about an on time flight
Back in the days when things went right.
When I come home, I’ll take a Greyhound bus.

So kick me and hassle me
‘cause my flight won’t wait for me.
Hold me so I can’t make gate on time.

I’m grievin’ on a jet place
And it’s a big colossal pain.
Oh, babe, I hate to fly.