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Song Parodies -> "Boldfinger"
Original Song Title:
"Goldfinger"
Original Performer:
Shirley Bassey / James Bond Movie Theme
Parody Song Title:
"Boldfinger"
Parody Written by:
The Comedian
The Lyrics
(loud brass-section instrumental intro)
BOLDFINGER!
He's the Doc,
The Doc with the Midas touch -
Inside-ass touch!
Such a BOLD finger!
(loud brass riff)
Rectums rue
His entering there within...butt-holes' co-lons!
Latex firm he will bore in your rear
As you lie with your thighs by your ears
"Your pros-tate's swol-len - that's why you block, sir -
I can tell be-cause, I'm Doc-tor - "
BOLDFINGER!
(loud brass riff)
Pretty boy
Beware when he says "Disrobe" -
Your butt he'll probe!
Latex firm he will bore in your rear
As you lie with your thighs by your ears
Now you've told your wife
Words that have shocked her:
"Honey, please pre-tend, you're Doc-tor - "
BOLDFINGER!
(loud brass riff)
Shitty world
That's where Doctor's finger goes -
Below your hose!
He'll say to disrobe!
To disrobe!
Then he'll probe!
Your prostate he'll probe!
He will probe!
LOVES TO PROBE!
LOVES TO PROBE!
BOLDFINGER!
He's the Doc,
The Doc with the Midas touch -
Inside-ass touch!
Such a BOLD finger!
(loud brass riff)
Rectums rue
His entering there within...butt-holes' co-lons!
Latex firm he will bore in your rear
As you lie with your thighs by your ears
"Your pros-tate's swol-len - that's why you block, sir -
I can tell be-cause, I'm Doc-tor - "
BOLDFINGER!
(loud brass riff)
Pretty boy
Beware when he says "Disrobe" -
Your butt he'll probe!
Latex firm he will bore in your rear
As you lie with your thighs by your ears
Now you've told your wife
Words that have shocked her:
"Honey, please pre-tend, you're Doc-tor - "
BOLDFINGER!
(loud brass riff)
Shitty world
That's where Doctor's finger goes -
Below your hose!
He'll say to disrobe!
To disrobe!
Then he'll probe!
Your prostate he'll probe!
He will probe!
LOVES TO PROBE!
LOVES TO PROBE!
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 1 | 1 | 1 |
User Comments
Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.
LOL...joke on me!
Heh heh heh, thanks, Pat!
Excellent... scans beautifully. You in the business? You seem to have intimate colo-rectal insight... at least enough to know that there's a 'vas deferens' between men and women! Great job!
So classy as always, Johnny....555
TJC: Thanks - nope, I'm not a proctologist, and I don't play one on TV either. Butt they're great parody material. There's no end to the proctology jokes you can pull out of your ass. By the way, did your vote register? You might want to double-check if you get the chance - and thanks for the kind words!
Kristof: Thanks, KR .... it's that lassy Shirley Bassey who's sassy-girly-classy!
Kristof: Thanks, KR .... it's that lassy Shirley Bassey who's sassy-girly-classy!
I was thinking of taking up proctology to cure this nasty nail-biting habit . . . Anyway, great job ass usual, Johnny. The most painful probe I ever received was from a woman doctor. I think she had "issues." This song brought back those painful memories! Thanks a crapload, dude! 555 anyway. Aside to TJC: "vas deferens" AUUUGHH! Perfect pun! You should be hung! :D
Thanks Stray Pooch....ironic, the least un-comfortable probe I ever received was from a woman doctor - and YES it was in a clinical examination setting!
Not "Brown-in-Eye",not"Give and get Thigh" ,not "In her Majesty's secret surface",or even,"Octopussy" could match the pulse-pounding ,ground shaking action of this parody! Three fives for you !
Ummm,Stray Pooch,could you get me that docs number ?
The whole hand would be 5 (x3)
TTP: "BOLDFINGER! - - BWAH-WAHHHHHH-WAHH!" Thanks!!
John Barry: Thanks! Are you referring to "The Spy Who Gloved Me" ?
John Barry: Thanks! Are you referring to "The Spy Who Gloved Me" ?
Hahahahaha that sounds like a job for John Hopoate!!!! All 5's mate!
Thanks, Troy!
Ha! Ha! (Cough! Cough!) Ha!
Thanks, Leo Jay! Dr. B. says you can get dressed now.
HAHAHAHA..i'm still a virgin in this respect, but at my age, i know my time is near....5s
Thanks alvin...yes...your time is sneaking right up BEHIND you...bwaw-WAWW-waww.
This "Hole" thing could be a "Casino Royale"pain in the Butt !
Where I used to live there actually was someone with that fetish. He once got fired from a nursing home for doing "rectal exams" on the patients. Yucky, imo, but he got off on that. Anyway, has anyone seen my parody of the same song, "Prickteaser"? -- MM
Thanks Michael ..... Yes, I read, voted, and commented on "Prickteaser" back in February ..... folks, here it is:
http://www.amiright.com/parody/60s/shirleybassey3.shtml
http://www.amiright.com/parody/60s/shirleybassey3.shtml
Oh Crap! Johnny, I didn't know or completely forgot about this one! I would not have put mine on if I had remembered. (Would havve been really embarrassing if there were comments from me here.) Whenever it's late and I'm stuck for an idea, I grab my list of AFI top 100 films or my Billboard book and slam one out. I used to use Chucky's search, but that went away. I thought knew your stuff well enough to not step in it. Oh well, Fives for you.
Oh Rick, don't sweat it, dude! I'm honored to be sharing similar parody inspirations with the likes of you!
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