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Song Parodies -> "I'll Slam Iraq"
Original Song Title:
"I Am A Rock"
Original Performer:
Simon and Garfunkel
Parody Song Title:
"I'll Slam Iraq"
Parody Written by:
William Tong
The Lyrics
As sung by Warmonger Dubya prior to the 2002 elections:
I'll win this way...
Ditto-sheep will not remember.
Go it alone...
Bracing for new scandals;
Something new might blow.
'Cause my polls are falling,
Violence makes a show.
I'll slam Iraq!
Distract from scandals I'm in...
(instrumental riff)
I've got balls...
To ditto-sheep, I'm mighty.
My power will consolidate.
I have no need of friendship.
Friendship has no gain.
It's treaties and the U.N. I disdain.
I'll slam Iraq!
Distract from scandals I'm in...
(instrumental riff)
It's war I love...
Because things were worse before.
9-11's seared in our memory.
My scandals from that summer - revealing that I lied.
Then World.com went bust, and Enron up and died.
I'll slam Iraq!
Distract from scandals I'm in...
(instrumental riff)
I'm not a crook...
I have Dick Cheney to protect me.
The press shields me with its armor.
Hiding in my room - safe from Iraq's doom.
I'm Poppy's son - no one can mess with me!
I'll slam Iraq!
Distract from scandals I'm in...
(instrumental riff)
Bomb Iraq, and I'll gain...
I'll use violence to disguise...
(instrumental ending)
Ditto-sheep will not remember.
Go it alone...
Bracing for new scandals;
Something new might blow.
'Cause my polls are falling,
Violence makes a show.
I'll slam Iraq!
Distract from scandals I'm in...
(instrumental riff)
I've got balls...
To ditto-sheep, I'm mighty.
My power will consolidate.
I have no need of friendship.
Friendship has no gain.
It's treaties and the U.N. I disdain.
I'll slam Iraq!
Distract from scandals I'm in...
(instrumental riff)
It's war I love...
Because things were worse before.
9-11's seared in our memory.
My scandals from that summer - revealing that I lied.
Then World.com went bust, and Enron up and died.
I'll slam Iraq!
Distract from scandals I'm in...
(instrumental riff)
I'm not a crook...
I have Dick Cheney to protect me.
The press shields me with its armor.
Hiding in my room - safe from Iraq's doom.
I'm Poppy's son - no one can mess with me!
I'll slam Iraq!
Distract from scandals I'm in...
(instrumental riff)
Bomb Iraq, and I'll gain...
I'll use violence to disguise...
(instrumental ending)
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 11 | 12 | 11 | ||||||||
| 2 | 0 | 0 | 1 | ||||||||
| 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 4 | 0 | 1 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 35 | 34 | 35 |
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