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Song Parodies -> "My Least Favorite Things"
Original Song Title:
"My Favorite Things"
Original Performer:
Sound of Music soundtrack
Parody Song Title:
"My Least Favorite Things"
Parody Written by:
lifeliver
The Lyrics
The great thing about fooling with this song is they run through the whole thing twice, which means I get two goes at it. Whoopee! And a double helping for you, dear reader. Mercifully, the fabulous Julie Andrews is still with us, but alas, her voice is not. I sure would have liked to hear her sing this.
MY LEAST FAVORITE THINGS
Ring-things on noses and whiskers on maidens
Loud heavy-metals and grungy bad-played-'uns
Suspender stockings and sleazy G-strings
These are a few of my least fav'rite things
Dun-colored hoodies that cuss and swear oodles
Schoolbells, alarm bells and streudels with noodles
Wild crow that caws when its neighbor sweet sings
These are a few of my least fav'rite things
Girls in hair stylings that look like car crashes
Red and black gunk on their lips and eyelashes
Golden seductions that melt into stings
These are a few of my least fav'rite things
When the bitch bites
When the bag swings
When I'm on a bad
I simply remember my least fav'rite things
Then I get really mad
Raindrops on laptops and soggy drowned kittens
Custody battles and sodden wool mittens
Brown vapor hackages when bimbo sings
These are a few of my least fav'rite things
My Little Ponies and precocious poodles
Dog smells and cat smells, likewise human boodles
Wild waves that churn my fragile inner things
These are a few of my least fav'rite things
Pretty white dresses with vomit in splashes
Snowflakes that stay in my cuts and my gashes
Silver white seniors trying to sing
These are a few of my least favorite things
When the spouse fights
When my neck wrings
When I'm feeling low
I simply remember my least fav'rite things
Then my mind starts to go
Ring-things on noses and whiskers on maidens
Loud heavy-metals and grungy bad-played-'uns
Suspender stockings and sleazy G-strings
These are a few of my least fav'rite things
Dun-colored hoodies that cuss and swear oodles
Schoolbells, alarm bells and streudels with noodles
Wild crow that caws when its neighbor sweet sings
These are a few of my least fav'rite things
Girls in hair stylings that look like car crashes
Red and black gunk on their lips and eyelashes
Golden seductions that melt into stings
These are a few of my least fav'rite things
When the bitch bites
When the bag swings
When I'm on a bad
I simply remember my least fav'rite things
Then I get really mad
Raindrops on laptops and soggy drowned kittens
Custody battles and sodden wool mittens
Brown vapor hackages when bimbo sings
These are a few of my least fav'rite things
My Little Ponies and precocious poodles
Dog smells and cat smells, likewise human boodles
Wild waves that churn my fragile inner things
These are a few of my least fav'rite things
Pretty white dresses with vomit in splashes
Snowflakes that stay in my cuts and my gashes
Silver white seniors trying to sing
These are a few of my least favorite things
When the spouse fights
When my neck wrings
When I'm feeling low
I simply remember my least fav'rite things
Then my mind starts to go
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| 5 | 10 | 10 | 11 |
User Comments
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Please note typo correction to penultimate verse, line 3 - it should read 'Wild waves that churn my fragile INNERLINGS (neologism) Sorry 'bout that
Good stuff LL, you had me at the first line. Among my faves: "Brown vapor hackages when bimbo sings" and all of the third verse!
My favorite sing of the day!
Thanks for punny comment, John. @ Peregrin - relieved you liked the line you singled out. I was worried I might get my poetic license suspended for that one.
:-) Excellent stuff.
What's wrong with sleazy G-strings?
"Silver white seniors trying to sing"
Silver white winters that melt into spring ... parody is one syl short.
This should be easy, given TOS's dactylic tetrameter, with the fourth accent often followed by only one unstressed, or none. Still 10-11 syls in all main stanzas, vs. 9 here. Also, some minor mis-stresses (as opposed to minor mistresses, which are illegal. ;)
Snowflakes don't sting on cuts. If anything, they help, as ice is a common first-aid remedy to relieve pain.
For a spin on TOS that is totally in favor of sleazy G-strings and much more,
"My Fave Risque' Things"
http://www.amiright.com/parody/60s/julieandrews87.shtml
"Silver white seniors trying to sing"
Silver white winters that melt into spring ... parody is one syl short.
This should be easy, given TOS's dactylic tetrameter, with the fourth accent often followed by only one unstressed, or none. Still 10-11 syls in all main stanzas, vs. 9 here. Also, some minor mis-stresses (as opposed to minor mistresses, which are illegal. ;)
Snowflakes don't sting on cuts. If anything, they help, as ice is a common first-aid remedy to relieve pain.
For a spin on TOS that is totally in favor of sleazy G-strings and much more,
"My Fave Risque' Things"
http://www.amiright.com/parody/60s/julieandrews87.shtml
I too would LOVE to hear Julie Andrews singing this one! Preferably drunk, and in a really bad mood - I think that would add just the right 'Patsy-from-Ab-Fab' vibe to the whole thing. Lots of great lines in this one - 555.
This is probably the best parody I have ever read. The first time I read this I laughed until my tears came out.
The author was only around for a little while, but he definitely had talent. And check out that Tommy Turtle guy. He wasn't a troll; more like our version of Simon Cowell. He's being too harsh here, to the point of being a troll
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