-> "I Hereby Announce My Candidacy"
Original Song Title:
"Yesterday x 7"
Parody Song Title:
"I Hereby Announce My Candidacy"
The Lyrics
Vote for me
There's no limit what I'll do for thee
Have a keg of beer's my policy
Or two or three, just vote for me
Vote for me
Every man will get an intern free
Every woman a pool boy trainee
Or two or three, just vote for me
If you tax too much you'll be free to bill Iran
And for payments due I will draft your Repo Man
Vote for me
For the upper class I'll peg the tee
For the homeless; a roof guarantee
Or two or three, just vote for me
If your TP's red, I'll clear out your haemorrhoids
Endless cloudless days'll tan you close to leatheroid
Vote for me
All my statesmanship's a parody
But that goes down with the bourgeoisie
So gather up and vote for me
(VOTERS:)
Mm mm... mm... mm... mMORE!
(ME:)
All Right! From the top again then!
Vote for me
I'll unclog your clogged up artery
And I'll cut down Michael Jackson's tree
All this and more, just vote for me
Vote for me
For the plumbers there'll be crack for free
For the postal; stamped stability
All this and more, just vote for me
Male enhancement pills will be free, if you just vote
(That one will be paid by per-click tax on remotes)
Vote for me
I will jerk up the economy
I'll be hands on bad pornography
All this and more, just vote for me
Hear me wildlife friends; I'll send pandas to your lawns
All your holy cows will be corporated fawns
Vote for me
I will outlaw Kmart queues for thee
Bring the moon down, set the monkeys free
So gather up and vote for me
(VOTERS:)
Mm mm... mm... mm... MORE!
(ME:)
All Right! From the top again then!
Vote for me
There's no end to my capacity
I'm pro-life, pro-choice, proactively
All this and more, just vote for me
Vote for me
I'll destroy the ring of power-ty
No more yellow cabs, just bravery
All this and more, just vote for me
I'll make donuts all pre-deductible to cops
And send Hillary Duff to work, in a sweat-shop
Vote for me
Get a leg up, bribes and mp3s
Where I banish kick-back factories
All this and more, just vote for me
For the comatosed I'll send vote-by-proxy aids
For this needy world I'm a Jack, of all the trades
Vote for me
I'm a master of diplomacy
"Send the French some Garlic-Frogleg Brie"
Now gather up and vote for me
(VOTERS:)
Mm mm... mm... MORE! MORE!
(ME:)
All Right! From the top again then!
Vote for me
I will play back crap on MTV
Bone that freemason cum'raderie
All this and more, just vote for me
Vote for me
I will rig your nestling's spellin' bee
Let him ace and nerds come fortythri
Po-ta-to-e, just vote for me
If you hesitate, I can send, the M.I.B
With some mutant freaks, to uplift, your E.E.G
Vote for me
I'll support a Utahn papacy
Werewolf cults and Wiccan lunacy
All this and more, just vote for me
How to pay for this you'll find out within due course
But as C.I.C I'll keep floggin' a dead horse
Vote for me
I'm as cool as Matrix (1, not 3)
Were I cooler; order autopsy
Now gather up and vote for me
(VOTERS:)
Mm mm... MORE! MORE! MORE!
(ME:)
All Right! From the top again then!
Vote for me
I'll cure SARS and AIDS and leprosy
I'll reverse your hysterectomy
Just gather up, and vote for me
Vote for me
I'll deport that Shannon Doherty
She's a threat to a community
Or two or three, just vote for me
She can cleanse a couch and take colour off a show
If you vote for me I'll remove her, quid pro quo
Vote for me
Get a heavy trucking license free
And a bitch who aced agility
Or two or three, just vote for me
Reps and Libs and Greens, for too long, have not been phat
They're as dated as hicks or Paris Hilton's twat
Vote for me
I'm no Starbucks coffee latte-ry
WYSIWYG is what you get from me
Must I say more, now vote for me!
(VOTERS:)
Mm MORE! MORE! MORE! MORE!
(ME:)
All Right! From the top again then!
Vote for me
I'll remove the tatts from Tommy Lee
And from Pammy; Hepatitis C
But not her Ds, so vote for me
Vote for me
I'll give Fab 5 colonoscopy
With the Hubble in entirety
And celery, so vote for me
My opponents blow, they're a steaming pile of dung
When they call me "ass" it's because I'm donkey hung
Vote for me
Get free pussy from the cattery
Perignon at every beanery
And cutlery, so vote for me
All these promises, you must ask, are they legit?
Hey Dude! Read my lips, would I lie, or you bespit?
Vote for me
I'm a klutz but I'm persistent, see
I don´t care if it's for champerty
Just help me win, and vote for me
(VOTERS:)
MORE! MORE! MORE! MORE! MORE!
(ME:)
All Right! From the top again then!
Vote for me
I'm the best since John F Kennedy
When it comes to demagoguery
An'dultery, so vote for me
Vote for me
I'm as hard as Sean "Bond" Connery
On my watch there'll be no World War 3
Just bobbery, so vote for me
If you vote for me you'll get anything you want
Sex, drugs, Rock & Roll, or my boring (wealthy) aunt
Vote for me
Get a square mile lunar property
Smoke some ganja, miss a deputy
Or two or three, just vote for me
I'll beat street punks up and use sigh-lencers on mimes
And on "Yesterday" paro-diiies; a tax on rhymes!
Vote for me
Get a million typists apery
Paparazzing my debauchery
All entrance free, just vote for me
Mm mm mm mm mm
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Voting Results
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Pacing: | 4.7 | |
How Funny: | 4.6 | |
Overall Rating: | 4.6 | |
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Total Votes: | 28 |
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Voting Breakdown
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| 3 | | 1 | |
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| 5 | | 23 | |
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