I dread it when weather gets cool
My wife says, "high heat is for fools"
She turns the temp down
Making me frown
She's the boss, and makes the rules

And so, to keep warm, I'm wearing sweaters
I'm wearing sweaters all the time
I've stocked up on mittens and sweaters
Been wearing sweaters
Since she's been mine

In our house it's fifty degrees
My hands are numb, and I must sneeze
More sweaters I wear
At my wife I swear
If she keeps this up, we'll both freeze

I try to keep warm by wearing sweaters
A bulky sweater all the time
I've stocked up on mittens and sweaters
I'm wearing sweaters
But don't feel fine

Wearing friggin' sweaters all the time
I'm wearing sweaters all the time
Sweaters...sweaters...sweaters...
I dream of sweaters in my mind
Sweaters...sweaters...sweaters...

I used to be warm and wear t-shirts
And flip-flops inside during blizzards and twenty below
Man, I was hot, but these days I am not
'Cause I can't feel my toes or my hands

And so, to keep warm, I'm wearning sweaters
I'm wearing sweaters all the time
Yes I've got mittens and sweaters
Been wearing sweaters
Since she's been mine

Wearing friggin' sweaters all the time
I'm wearing sweaters all the time
Sweaters...sweaters...sweaters...
I dream of sweaters in my mind...
Sweaters...sweaters...sweaters...