I have asked Kim Jong Un, if he please wouldn't visit soon,
Climate up here's not much worse than Pyongyang.
There'd be Raptors to watch, as he'd ratchet things up a notch,
And it's close to D.C. He replied, and he sang...

KIM's CHORUS#1:
"Your mistake was to shelve war way back after 1812
(Conflicts North-South helped my clan get ahead).
A good border zone keeps two entities on their own.
Yanks say 'DMZee', you should say 'DMZed'."

Great Leader, don't send missiles to our Queen Charlotte Isles,
A mystical place natives call 'Haida Gwai'.
We hope you and Don work things out; no need to rant and shout.
Diplomacy's tough, but please give it a try.

KIM'S CHORUS#2:
"From the wheat on your Prairies to the cheese from your dairies,
Metal tariffs in place on U.S. border fence.
You should follow our music score, as played in Singapore.
Hide heavy weapons, cozy up to Trump-Pence."

Kim, don't plant any nuke on, our territory called the Yukon.
The soil there's quite poor -- permafrost, rocks and scree.
It's too cold to grow a cuke on; you'll need to keep your tuque on
When you visit with Dennis. Bring extra kimchee.

KIM's CHORUS#1 (reprise):
"Your mistake was to shelve war way back after 1812
(Conflicts North-South helped my clan get ahead).
A good border zone keeps two entities on their own.
Yanks say 'DMZee', you should say 'DMZed'."