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Song Parodies -> "Femme Mattel"

Original Song Title:

"Femme Fatale"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Velvet Underground

Parody Song Title:

"Femme Mattel"

Parody Written by:

Alvin Rhodes

The Lyrics

...an homage to the barbie doll...the first woman i ever saw naked...
here she comes
she's always right in step
she's plastic and could break in two
its true
her body's stylized
just check out her paint colored eyes
she's huge on top
but she's slim downtown
tannish brown

she needs a lot of clothes
(she's a femme mattel)
she does just what she please
(she's a femme mattel)
and ken, she loves to tease
(she's a femme mattel)
though she cannot walk
and she cannot talk

she never sews or cooks
she's dolled up just like heaven, take a look
a constant smile, she never frowns
never down
little boys will oft mistreat
her hair, they'll cut, and her head, they'll beat
the way they play is so darn cruel
power tools

a little turned up nose
(she's a femme mattel)
a perfect set of knees
(she's a femme mattel)
in little shorts and tees
(she's a femme mattel)
feminists may knock
others say she rocks



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 LittleLots
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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 11

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   10
 10
 10
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Timmy1000 - May 04, 2009 - Report this comment
A twisted parody from a OS by a twisted not well known band - nicely done - 5's for this one.
alvin - May 04, 2009 - Report this comment
thanks timmy
2Eagle - May 04, 2009 - Report this comment
The doll itself was cheap, but it took a bankbook to accesorize it. Frankenstein Barbie.
alvin - May 04, 2009 - Report this comment
thanks 2eagle...yeah, mattel knew what they were doin' alright
Jim Rotondo - May 04, 2009 - Report this comment
Excellent Alvin, wish I had one years ago to go with my Johnny West, his horse Thunderbolt and GI Joe. Sadly, it was just Johnny and Joe...no room for error.
Andy Primus - May 04, 2009 - Report this comment
So your toys were Barbie dolls - I was more the Action Man kind of boy. Maybe your parents wanted a daughter - did your mummy dress you up in pink frillies when you were a baby?
AFW - May 04, 2009 - Report this comment
Superb sub-titling..fine parody, too
alvin - May 04, 2009 - Report this comment
thanks jim...lol...thanks andy....my sister had one, not me...honest....thanks AFW...glad ya enjoyed
Christie Marie M - May 04, 2009 - Report this comment
I heard this OS and I also realized that Duran Duran did a remake of this OS in '93. Yeah, I enjoyed Barbies and Kens as a little girl. Now I'm going back to Barbie again for the first time. Today they make cooler Barbie dolls along with her "sisters". I feel I'm never too old for Barbies. This month I bade highly and ordered Happy Family Pregnant Midge and Alan dolls (they're Barbie's friends), rare items that were pulled off of WalMart stores a few years back, due to age appropriate issues. Friends tease me and tell me instead of playing with Barbies, I should to go to aerobics class, shop for jewelry, or have candlelight dinner with a handsome lawyer. I didn't care. Anyways, you dolled up this song for sure and creative switch of the title. 555.
alvin - May 04, 2009 - Report this comment
thanks christie...pregnant midge ?????....too funny...and what is skipper up to these days ?
Mark Scotti - May 05, 2009 - Report this comment
Excellent parody, Alvin! Boy, does that bring up mammaries!!!!
alvin - May 05, 2009 - Report this comment
thanks mark...indeed
Tommy Turtle - May 08, 2009 - Report this comment
Fives from the home page for the title switch alone. Looking forward to the sequel, about the rumors that Ken is finally going to come out of the closet.
alvin - May 08, 2009 - Report this comment
thanks TT....lol

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