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Song Parodies -> "I Spend All My Dole On Beer"
Original Song Title:
"It's Still Rock And Roll To Me"
(MP3)Original Performer:
Billy Joel
Parody Song Title:
"I Spend All My Dole On Beer"
Parody Written by:
Kristof Robertson
The Lyrics
Dole: A common British/Australian word for Unemployment Benefits.
What's the matter with the life I'm leadin'?
"Dude, the government pays your way"
I'm not unemployed; I'm ca-reer restin'
"Sittin' on your fat a$$ all day"
Down the track or splashin' out on my honey
And Child Support says I should cough up for my sonny
Don't pay any rent because I live with Mummy
And I spend all my dole on beer
What's the matter with the jobs I'm offered?
"Can't you hold one for just a week?"
Bussing tables daily or street sweepin'
Lack that necessary cool mystique
Nowadays we all have rights, fundamental
You can't make me work; you can't be too judgemental
Taxes? Shmaxes! I'm happy to be lax, yes
I spend all my dole on beer
It doesn't matter what they say in the papers
Coz I ain't no slave or mere machine
I'm a slob, layabout
But I can't do without all my DVDs and magazines:
"Big Breasted Barmaids 16"
How about I hook you up with free cable
And some cheap Taiwanese T-shirts?
Please don't say a thing to my Job Advisor
Coz he thinks that my back still hurts
The seven years I spent at the Univers'ty
It made me smarter and for sure, far more thirsty
Amen! Say whendrinkin' Heineken
I spend all my dole on beer
(Instrumental)
What's the reason that I'm not nine-to-fivin'
I've a list longer than your arm
There's no way that I'll be suit-and-tie-in'
I'll get by on my wit and charm
Be responsible? Hey man, you're so funny
It's more likely I'll marry a Playboy Bunny
Got a nice tan, cold can, no plan, understand?
I spend all my dole on beer
Mother always wonders why I've got no money
Coz I spend all my dole on beer!
"Dude, the government pays your way"
I'm not unemployed; I'm ca-reer restin'
"Sittin' on your fat a$$ all day"
Down the track or splashin' out on my honey
And Child Support says I should cough up for my sonny
Don't pay any rent because I live with Mummy
And I spend all my dole on beer
What's the matter with the jobs I'm offered?
"Can't you hold one for just a week?"
Bussing tables daily or street sweepin'
Lack that necessary cool mystique
Nowadays we all have rights, fundamental
You can't make me work; you can't be too judgemental
Taxes? Shmaxes! I'm happy to be lax, yes
I spend all my dole on beer
It doesn't matter what they say in the papers
Coz I ain't no slave or mere machine
I'm a slob, layabout
But I can't do without all my DVDs and magazines:
"Big Breasted Barmaids 16"
How about I hook you up with free cable
And some cheap Taiwanese T-shirts?
Please don't say a thing to my Job Advisor
Coz he thinks that my back still hurts
The seven years I spent at the Univers'ty
It made me smarter and for sure, far more thirsty
Amen! Say whendrinkin' Heineken
I spend all my dole on beer
(Instrumental)
What's the reason that I'm not nine-to-fivin'
I've a list longer than your arm
There's no way that I'll be suit-and-tie-in'
I'll get by on my wit and charm
Be responsible? Hey man, you're so funny
It's more likely I'll marry a Playboy Bunny
Got a nice tan, cold can, no plan, understand?
I spend all my dole on beer
Mother always wonders why I've got no money
Coz I spend all my dole on beer!
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 0 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 2 | 2 | 1 | 1 | ||||||||
| 3 | 1 | 1 | 1 | ||||||||
| 4 | 0 | 0 | 1 | ||||||||
| 5 | 11 | 12 | 11 |
User Comments
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Great stuff! Hre's to government: They produce nothing...just take your money and redistribute it, and take a hefty portion for themselves!
Haven't heard TOS in a while, but this is pretty enlightening ( and funny ) Kristof.
Just doled you out three 5's here, you lazy wastrel ~ ~ ~
wondrous wordplay...5s
Ironic that former American Presidential Candidate, retired Senator Bob Dole, is a Republican ... but wait a minute ... "Bob" can also mean "to cut", as in "to cut your hair/bob your hair" ... and Republicans like to cut "the dole" ... hmm ... okay, never mind!
Funny with a capitol F...well worth five doles
Chuck: As long as I get my piece of the pie, dude, I don't care! ;-)
Red Ant: Thanks, compadre
Paul: Stick and stones, man...sticks and stones.;-)
Alvin: Cheers, Mr. R!
J.D: Wha?...I repeat...wha? ;-)
AFW: Fanks!
Red Ant: Thanks, compadre
Paul: Stick and stones, man...sticks and stones.;-)
Alvin: Cheers, Mr. R!
J.D: Wha?...I repeat...wha? ;-)
AFW: Fanks!
Kristof - I was thinking more along the lines of "It takes one to know one" ~ ~ ~
Not crazy about the politics, but the song is a five.
Paul: I guess you're right there, buddy!
Michael: It wasn't meant to represent any political viewpoint, more a summary of the state of play of the social welfare system, particularly in the UK...
Michael: It wasn't meant to represent any political viewpoint, more a summary of the state of play of the social welfare system, particularly in the UK...
Well, in America, before Prohibition was completely repealed in 1933, the government allowed the sale of "near-beer" that was just 3.2 percent alcohol. They could have sung, "Should 3.2 appear too small, be thankful I don't take it all." But George Harrison wouldn't be born for another nine years, give or take a few weeks.
It's alright if "Big Breasted Barmaids 16" is the first one you've read, but after reading the first 15, I found #16 a bit of an anticlimax - the dole here is a real option, as I'm sure you remember, Kristof, one that and many people take - great job! - 555
Hahahahahaha, that parody is bloody awsome mate!!! Given you all 5s!!! Check out my "Dole Bludgin' Man" parody of Barnesy's "Working Class Man" on this page http://www.amiright.com/parody/80s/jimmybarnes2.shtml .
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