I stole de mobile, but I did not get de papacy
I stole de mobile, but I did not get de papacy

All around in de Rome town
Dey're trying to track me down
Dey say dey have found me sins quirky
For a postal of de papacy
For a strife over liturgy

But I say

I stole de mobile, but I swear it was a sacrament
I stole de mobile, and dey say it's an Elysian offense

Papa John Paul he elated me
His wheels' my bestow
Every time I planned a sin
He said "Hold it before you blow"
He said "Hold it before you blow"

Servo, servo

I stole de mobile, but I swear it's for a pilgrimage
I stole de mobile, and I say it was no Cardinal offense

Free gas came my way one day
Dey're faithhearted in dis town
All of a sudden I hear bishops and priests
claiming my papa's crown
So I skipped, I skipped, I skipped dis down

And I say if I were guilty I would pay
I stole de mobile, but I did not get de papacy
I stole de mobile, but I did not get de papacy

Paternoster is not chatter to me
And what's mine to be must be
Every day de pedal's pressed to de floor
But one day de bottom will drop out
Yes, one day de bottom will drop out

But I drive

I drive de mobile, I'm adrift from Christianity
I drive de mobile, it's my hotrod of insanity