A long, long time ago
I can still remember when my clothes weren't all in a pile
And if they happen to have a chance
Mice come here to sing and dance
No need for waiting lines or single-file
Apparently I'm a good fibber
"My room is clean" without a quiver
Can't get through the doorstep
Wouldn't want to take one more step
I can't remember if I lied
When my friends lost at seek, and I won hide
I knew to someone I'd confide
That my....room is.....a sty

Well, my, my! My bedroom's a sty
Got a hopper* from my Popper**
As to make the time fly
And from downstairs, I hear my mom's strangled cry
Screamin' "Clean it up today or you die!"
"Clean it up today or you die."

I pull on my latex gloves,
And pray for strength from God above
And edge over my for
Quickly flip on some rock 'n' roll
I hear it's good for your heart and soul
And now I'll procrastinate no mo'
Well, I toss out some old diving fins
That are followed by my at-home gym
Three pairs of old shoes
That smell so bad I'm turning blue
No more will I trip over the pup***
'Cause all this crap's thrown in the pickup truck
If clean by night it'll be luck
The day.....my conscience fried

I started singin' my, my! My bedroom's a sty
Got a hopper* from my Popper**
As to make the time fly
And from downstairs, I hear my mom's strangled cry
Screamin' "Clean it up today or you die!"
"Clean it up today or you die."

Then after ten hours, on the phone
I've got no progress to be shown
And I think, "Oh dear, stupid me!"
Found my pictures with the King of Queens
And an old sausage from Jimmy Dean's
That really had no reason to be
And on the stairs I'm trudgin' down
When my bag is ripped by BK Crown
To my room I return
To see what I can burn
I hide a park that got low marks
Hoping to trash it in the park
Started at sunrise; now it's dark
Oi vey.....my mind has died

I was singin' my, my! My bedroom's a sty
Got a hopper* from my Popper**
As to make the time fly
And from downstairs, I hear my mom's strangled cry
Screamin' "Clean it up today or you die!"
"Clean it up today or you die."

Turn the fan on 'cause I can't get melter****
It broke and fell; I dove for shelter
The sirens are here at laaaaaaaaaast
Know I'll return with a cast
But I'll be gone pretty fast
I blackout and go to my happy past
Well, the laughing gas was sweet perfume
Surgeon said, "Sit still buffoon!"
I tried to get up and dance;
Got tackled by a nurse named Lance
Then I was back in my home field
The dust and dirt refused to yield
I'll give you a guess on how I feel
The day.....my Windex dried

I started singin' my, my! My bedroom's a sty
Got a hopper* from my Popper**
As to make the time fly
And from downstairs, I hear my mom's strangled cry
Screamin' "Clean it up today or you die!"
"Clean it up today or you die."

And there! The stuff was all in place
No more room or leftover space
And no reason to start again!
Trashers be nimble, trashers come quick
I don't need this old hockey stick
Especially when it was my friend's
I took a bow on my "stage"
A happy girl at young age
Who'd seen and defeated hell
With no magic or spell
And as I settled down for the night
I knew that something was not right
But I gave up without a fight
'Cause today.....I cleaned the sty

I was singin' bye, bye! It's no longer a sty
Used the hopper* from my Popper**
To make tennis balls fly
And when downstairs, I hear my dad askin' why
Sayin' "Don't you want a piece of this pie?"
"Don't you want a piece of this pie?"

I awoke the next day to some news:
When I'd settled down for a snooze
I didn't clean; I start to sway
I ascended from the first floor
Where I'd left a mess, years before
But I clean up, so I could go out and play
I went upstairs without a scream
I dreamt a dream and schemed a scheme
A single word was spoken*****
The silence then was broken
And then, without waffles or toast
Looking like I'd seen a ghost
I caught a Greyhound to the coast
And now.....my name is Ty

And I was singin' my, my! My bedroom's a sty
Got a hopper* from my Popper**
As to make the time fly
And from downstairs, I hear my mom's strangled cry
Screamin' "Clean it up today or you die!"
"Clean it up today or you die."

I was singin' bye, bye 'cause my room's still a sty
Sold the hopper* from my Popper**
But I still cannot fly
And all around school, kids are askin' why?
It's cause my mom does not lie