-> "The Day The Oil Rig Died"
Original Song Title:
"American Pie"
(MP3)
Parody Song Title:
"The Day The Oil Rig Died"
The Lyrics
A long, long time ago...
On the Gulf Coast shoreline
The white beaches used to stretch for miles.
And business owners had a chance
And tourists came there for romance
And it was full of life and people smiled.
But in the Gulf BP was drilling
With greedy hopes they’d make a killing.
There they drilled a deep well
Too bad it was a cheap well
Though later guilt would be denied
When the work went slow they did decide
To act to pick up the stride
And this is what they cried
“Oh why, why has so much time gone by?
Tell those bastards to work faster and they’d better comply
We’ll get rich quick if procedures don’t apply
You know, this should be a gravy-train ride
This should be a gravy-train ride.”
And so they picked up their speed
Driven by their insatiable greed
Soon the cash would start to flow
As they were getting near their goal
They forewent sealing up the hole
‘Cause doing it right would have been too slow
So corners were cut, expenses trimmed
‘Cause to take time would make profits slim
The oil started through
But then one day the oil rig blew
So now the beaches are covered with muck
With some sick pelicans and some oily ducks
The whole Gulf Coast was out of luck
The day the oil rig died.
And now we’re asking
Why, why did BP not comply?
Rules were broken, lies were spoken, and eleven men died
And their stocks have dropped, their reputation is fried
And the oil spill has spread far and wide
Oil now has spread far and wide
Now for some time, the oil spill has grown
For how long seems to remain unknown
But oil spills aren’t new for BP
Then the CEO appeared on the scene
In a fifty million buck smokescreen
And a voice that gave false guarantees
Oh and while the sea was turning brown
BP spread dispersant around
The oil was dispersed
Now marine life is cursed
And while lawyers started gath’ring facts
The booms didn’t hold the oil back
And beaches started turning black
When the CEO lied
We’re still asking
Why, why did BP not comply?
Rules were broken, lies were spoken, and eleven men died
And their stocks have dropped, their reputation is fried
And the oil spill has spread far and wide
Oil now has spread far and wide
Helter Skelter in the summer swelter
Cleanup workers fall ill with no shelter
Heat indexes rising fast
The oil is fouling the marsh grass
Destroyed by oil it is shrinking fast
While the Chairman keeps hoping that all will pass
Now the Gulf Coast air is cloaked in doom
While the burning oil makes toxic fumes
We decided to sell
Oh, but the housing values fell
And as months go by with no resolve
Obama finally gets involved
Will BP finally get dissolved
When Hayward testifies?
And we’re still asking
Why, why did BP not comply?
Rules were broken, lies were spoken, and eleven men died
And their stocks have dropped, their reputation is fried
And the oil spill has spread far and wide
Oil now has spread far and wide
Oh and so Congress called in to speak
BP’s CEO, looking meek
Just wanting his life back again
They said for centralizers, twenty-one
Your crew said just six and we’re done
So, please explain this to us if you can
Oh , and as we watched him in his chair
He calmly said, “I wasn’t there.
I didn’t work at the well
There’s nothing I can tell.”
And as the Representatives him grilled
CEO Hayward remained chilled
With no care for all that he had killed
The day he testified
He was thinking
"My, my, how these Yanks love to cry
They still need us so won’t bleed us
‘Til we’re completely dry
On contributions I can always rely
I just know, I can always buy an ally
I can always buy an ally."
I met a girl who cleaned the goo
And I smiled and asked her, “Hey, what’s new?”
She flipped me off and just went
I went down to the Gulf Coast shore
Where I’d seen lots of girls years before
But the Coast Guard said they’d all left from the scent
And in the oil pelicans screamed
The dolphins cried out in pain extreme
Some sea-turtles were choking
And all the fish were croaking
And the seafood I had eaten most
Could not be served, ‘cause the catch was gross
I guess I’ll have to eat pot-roast
Because the oil rig died
And we’re still asking
Why, why did BP not comply?
Rules were broken, lies were spoken, and eleven men died
And their stocks have dropped, their reputation is fried
And the oil spill has spread far and wide
Oil now has spread far and wide
We’re still asking
Why, why did BP not comply?
Rules were broken, lies were spoken, and eleven men died
And their stocks have dropped, their reputation is fried
And the oil spill has spread far and wide
Oil now has spread far and wide
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Voting Results
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How Funny: | 5.0 | |
Overall Rating: | 5.0 | |
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Total Votes: | 3 |
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