Hey babe, they’re all bunched together
Maybe they’re not blinking
Due to changes in the weather
It’ll likely kill us both tonight
Is that one brown?
Go on and play some Christmas music
Then get more in town.

Say, honey, it’s funny they’re not flashing yet
Thought they were all checked out
F-f-f-faulty lights, I guess.
When they work, they’re sweet and wonderful
If not, I get really mean
I will stomp my boots
I’ll be a brute
And it’s likely I’ll be causing a scene
Woooeee hooooeeee
F-f-f-faulty lights I guess

Hey no, not into that outlet!
Crap, now I’m blinded
We better get a medic
I may survive, so let’s move this thing along
You see the burned out ones from the street
Why won't the red lights come on?

Let’s handle our candles, they’re a better bet
At least till they all burn out.
M-m-m-maybe then we’ll rest.
Their flames are warm and they’re wonderful
If not, we have gasoline.
Use the fossil fuel
Besides, it's cool.
If it starts a fire we’ll call the marines.
Woooeee hooooeeee
Th-th-th-that would be the best!