At first i was afraid, i was petrified
when you said you had ten inches lord i almost died
But I spent so many years waiting for a man that long
That I grew strong, and I knew I could take you on


But there you are
another lie
I was ready for a Big Mac and you brought me a french fry
I should have known it was bullshit
Just a sad pathetic dream
I should have known there was no anaconda lurking in those jeans

Go on now go!
Walk out the door
Don't you promise me 10 inches and turn up with only 4
Weren't you a prat to think I wouldn't catch you out
Don't you know we're only joking when we say size doesn't count

I will survive I will survive
cause as long as I have batteries
my sex life is gonna thrive
I will always have good sex from a hand full of latex
I will survive
I will survive
hey hey hey

It took all my self control not to laugh out loud
when I saw your lil onion standing tall and proud
But to hell with all of your egos
and to hell with all your needs
now I am saving all my loving for a cordless muti-speed

go on now go
just make a dash
last time I saw a prick that small I was watching Gladstone run nude hash
I should have asked for confirmation
I should have asked for referees
then I wouldn't have you waving that wee winky thing at me

Go on now go
just hit the track
don't you bring me home no tiddlers
cause i'll always throw themback
the only thing that I could do with a prick as small as yours
is to stick it with a toothpick and dip it in tomato sauce

Go on now go
get out of my sight
I'm going back to my appliance
cause i know it's length is right
If I ever see your tiny
tockley at my door
You'll be counting all your inches as you pick them off the floor