-> "I Will Apply"
Original Song Title:
"I Will Survive"
(MP3)
Parody Song Title:
"I Will Apply"
The Lyrics
At first I was a maid, for a widowed bride
But then she wanted parts of me which I could not provide
And then I spent too many nights dancing 'round in just a thong
But it felt wrong
So I learned how to make sarongs
But sales went slack
Ran out of lace
So I went out to find a job that would put food upon my plate
But I am having not much luck
I should have stayed for my degree
If on my own I could have reckoned this is what becomes of me...
And now I blow
Balloons, a chore
Dress like a clown now, work for a birthday party store
It's lots of fun to try to make those kiddies cry
But then I stumble
Big-ass shoes the reason why...
But I'm not shy
I will apply
Oh as long as I can get a job that won't make me serve pie
Gotta have a job to live, but won't sell my body yet
Won't take a dive, and that's no jive
Hey hey
It was kind of strange and bad, worked at a Wal-Mart
Kept trying hard to find the pieces of those broken carts
And I spent way too many nights just stocking sh!t up on the shelves
They were too high
The boss would try to rub my thigh
And he'd feel me
Out of the blue
He'd try to take me in his office, see if he could screw
And so I end up stopping him
Then when his testes hit my knee
And now I'm slaving in a slaughterhouse, someone please rescue me...
Because it blows
Blood on the floor
Can't block it out now
Those headless chickens, running gore
And I just made it to first break then said goodbye
But I will not grumble
Just got another job tonight...
Do you want fries?
Or super size?
Oh, I know it's not the greatest job but I get off at five
Some folks must have fries to live
Take your order please, that's it
Don't take no jive, get off at five
Oooh.......
Go on now go
Get out the store
Can't have it your way
This isn't Burger King no more
Weren't you the one who tried to steal an Apple Pie?
We're gonna rumble
Boy, I'll blacken up your eyes
Don't try to lie, know you're the guy
So long, don't come here any more, I'll call the cops bye-bye
Man I hate this stupid job
Have to deal with all these slobs
Why'd I apply, I wanna cry.....
[fade out]
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Voting Results
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Pacing: | 5.0 | |
How Funny: | 5.0 | |
Overall Rating: | 5.0 | |
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Total Votes: | 10 |
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Voting Breakdown
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| 5 | | 10 | |
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