Making fun of music, one song at a time. Since the year 2000.
Check out the two amIright misheard lyrics books including one book devoted to misheard lyrics of the 1980s.
(Toggle Right Side Navigation)

Song Parodies -> "If You Would Beat My Hind End"

Original Song Title:

"If You Could Read My Mind"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Gordon Lightfoot

Parody Song Title:

"If You Would Beat My Hind End"

Parody Written by:

Malcolm Higgins

The Lyrics

if you would beat my hind end,
what a thrill those marks would leave
just like a whipper snipper
on my arm yeah all the marks it'd leave
in a dungeon dark, or a rack so long
the pain is my release
it frees the inner me
and I will never be set free,
till the s and m is brought from inside me

if you would beat my hind well,
what a thrill you'd be to me
just like a scrambled egg dish
beat me round with a whisk you see
when you reach the part where the blood will come
then treat me medically
pour on alcohol
and you won't use that stick again
cause the sight of blood's too hard to take

I always feel like a movie star
who gets burned with wax and whipped
enter number two, my dominaqueen
creates a scene of bringing all the dark things out in me
but for now, pain is just surreal

I never thought I could be this way,
and I got to say, I love pain, do you get it?
I don't know where my mind went wrong,
was it wearing thongs? but I just have lost my track

if you would beat my hind end,
what a thrill those marks would leave
just like a whipper snipper
on my arm yeah all the marks it'd leave
in a dungeon dark, or a rack so long
the pain is my release
it frees the inner me
and I will never be set free,
till the s and m is brought from inside me

I never thought I could be this way,
and I got to say, I love pain, do you get it?
I don't know where my mind went wrong,
was it wearing thongs? but I just have lost my track

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

Place Your Vote

 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



In order for your vote to count, you need to hit the 'Place Your Vote' button.
 

Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 3.0
Overall Rating: 3.5

Total Votes: 2

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 1
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 1
 
 4   1
 1
 1
 
 5   1
 0
 0
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Red Ant - November 07, 2005 - Report this comment
Malcolm, I had trouble getting several lines to scan. Good job on this OS, though I'm afraid you only get 12 lashes instead of 15.
Paul - April 21, 2007 - Report this comment
This is great, have you recorded it?

The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.

Link To This Page

The address of this page is: http://www.amiright.com/parody/70s/gordonlightfoot60.shtml For help, see the examples of how to link to this page.

This is view # 1213