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Song Parodies -> "Hope Martha's Not Homely Tonight"
Original Song Title:
"Don't Let Me Be Lonely Tonight"
(MP3)Original Performer:
James Taylor
Parody Song Title:
"Hope Martha's Not Homely Tonight"
Parody Written by:
Jeff Reuben
The Lyrics
Stand up to English might,
Cross the Delaware by night,
But coming home I am filled with fright,
I hope Martha's not homely tonight
Join Sam--John Adams for swill
(Oh) To be the first president, yes, it's quite a thrill,
But I'd give up the dollar bill,
If Martha wasn't homely tonight.
Way back when we first met
Martha Custis was a tease
My friends tried to warn me, my new girlfriend had fleas
Jefferson chided that her head was lopsided
But I just took the first girl I found.
Cannot lie, that you'll see (you reek baby),
Told dad that I chopped down his cherry tree
Can't get past her horse-faced overbite (overbite),
So get bags for her head, turn off the light
Looks like she lost another bar fight.
I guess that poor Martha's still homely tonight.
Maybe I'll hit on Jefferson's wife
Cross the Delaware by night,
But coming home I am filled with fright,
I hope Martha's not homely tonight
Join Sam--John Adams for swill
(Oh) To be the first president, yes, it's quite a thrill,
But I'd give up the dollar bill,
If Martha wasn't homely tonight.
Way back when we first met
Martha Custis was a tease
My friends tried to warn me, my new girlfriend had fleas
Jefferson chided that her head was lopsided
But I just took the first girl I found.
Cannot lie, that you'll see (you reek baby),
Told dad that I chopped down his cherry tree
Can't get past her horse-faced overbite (overbite),
So get bags for her head, turn off the light
Looks like she lost another bar fight.
I guess that poor Martha's still homely tonight.
Maybe I'll hit on Jefferson's wife
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Voting Results
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Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| Pacing | How Funny | Overall Rating | |||||||||
| 1 | 0 | 1 | 0 | ||||||||
| 2 | 1 | 1 | 1 | ||||||||
| 3 | 0 | 0 | 1 | ||||||||
| 4 | 2 | 0 | 0 | ||||||||
| 5 | 29 | 30 | 30 |
User Comments
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Lots of great lines but, the closer floored me! 555
Funny history spoof, with many funny lines..
DECATHLON a right old chuckle fest nice one
infotainment
That's something to take back to school.
I cannot tell a lie: this is damn funny.
"But I'd give up the dollar bill" - LOL! - and if she was this homely I can't believe she wasn't more lonely - 555 - (great last line too)
(DEC1) "Jefferson chided that her head was lopsided"...that's SO harsh, JefferReubenson...but funny as all get out. LOLOL! 555
A triplet of 5s for you sir
Who wouldn't hit on Jefferson's wife, that babe is ALMOST, and very very very very ALMOST as cute as Arwen!
(Decathlon) George Washington slept here ... and there ... and over there ... and in due time ... he became The Father of Our Country.
(Decathlon - Event 1) Um...what? Guess I need to catch up on my American history.
(decath1) see above, and what could George have been thinking?
DECATHLON...I swear I'd read this before...where's my comment? =( Oh well, I'll say it now...I love this, Jeff! Very very funny...and the perfect punchline there at the end!
Brilliant. "chided/lopsided" and "I'd give up the dollar bill" are choice. If you had only managed to work in "for her I'm not yearnin', I'd rather mount Vernon", I'd have given you a 6-6-6, but alas I have to knock you down a peg. :-P
(SOTM) I only kinda get it, being Australian and all... but I'll trust my instincts and give ya 5s
(SOTM) Pretty good, even if DKTOS. A favorite line: "Jefferson chided that her head was lopsided."
(SOTM) The "Jefferson's wife" line is classic, man. Are you sure you weren't talking about Weezy? Anyway, you were right all along, you ARE the Master of the Historical Parody. At first I thought Martha was that (censored) on TV who went to prison. That would've been funny, too. Excellent job! 555
SOTM - No wonder he went to war, anything to get out of the spouse... ehh house.
(SOTM) I cannot tell a lie, Jeff...this was brilliant!
(SOTM) Too bad he didn't live long enough to go after Madison's wife, I hear that Dolly was hot.
Dude, I'm related (albeit distantly) to Martha Washington! 5's anyway. -- MM
LOL awesome, 5s!
(SOTM) This was funny.
(SOTM) Still lots of great lines, ie, "Jefferson chided that her head was lopsided." The last line still floors me though.
(SOTM) See above, my fellow AmIRightians!
(SOTM) See above...at least it's not MY fault that I know zilch about American history...blame my school.
(SOTM) I've alreday quoted my favourite lines above, and I now add "Jefferson chided that her head was lopsided" - lol, Jeff
(SOTM) Ah yes, your first decathlon entry, and if I remember, the one that almost got away. Glad it didn't
(SOTM) Nice usage of history, I think....anyways, nice job
A political peice that I actually like and found hilarious!!! It fits the theme scrapping by at the wooden teeth, because George Washington the singer of this ballad was famous. Great work here Jeff.
oh the benefits of a quality back catalogue. great work.
(Ages2) It's a lot of fun to be able to revisit old works, for my vantage point, thanks to the advent of Youtube. That being said, this was pretty darn funny, but I had trouble reading along to Taylor's pacing. It's not quite up to the topic proscribed either, but yours is the first in this round I'm looking at, so it's not a shutout for you yet.
(Ages2) See above...and I still have no idea what's going on. Props for using this parody again instead of writing a new one,
AGES...still so funny, Jeff...and is there anyone more famous than GW? I don't think so...love it!
(Ages) Sorry, but this one totally turned me off. I like that you chose a famous person of way back when. But the homely jokes I found boring, trying, and unfunny. Okay, I did half-smile a couple of times. Your pacing seemed a bit off, too. 4-2-3.
(Ages) This was a chucklefest for me , Jeff. So wrong and yet so right
(Ages) I found this one pretty funny, and since I was not around when this one was in SOTM it was my first read of it. Hope your daughter is OK, hope everything is OK. . . .
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