[JUDY]

Now if I shop here, it matters that you see
There's not a lot of things that look too good on me
I got an invitation to the senior fair
It's taking me some time to work out what to wear

I like this little number with the frilly bows
You have it in a triple-hefty, I suppose

Just don't say that
Makes me look fat

I came because the Penney's doesn't have my size
Plus, they're next to Arby's and the smell of fries
And furthermore I think that they discriminate
The salesgirl said she couldn't handle things my weight

I got an invitation to that chic event
But I don't want to show up in a circus tent

Just don't say that
Makes me look fat

[SOLO]

Angie, she's my sister, pokes fun at my size
Carol Ann, a friend, but does she criticize
Why am I the "stout" one? Why am I the whale?
Who diets like a speed freak but to no avail?

You'd better find me something I look slimmer in
And doesn't look revolting if I show some skin

Just don't say that ma-a-akes
Me...look...fat


[SALESLADY #1]

Don't worry honey, we'll make you look lovely
We've got the plus sizes, you're in the right store

[SALESLADY #2]

We have the perfect, attire to best dress you
Comfy and roomy, yardage galore

[SALESLADY #1]

We think this will fit you, with little adjustment

[SALESLADY #2]

It's such a nice item, they named it twice
They call it a muu-muu, a name so exotic

[SALESLADY #1]

It's from Honolulu, isn't that nice?

[JUDY]

I don't want a dumb muu-muu!

[SALESLADY #2]

Oh, go ahead wear it, you'll like it a lot

[JUDY]

I don't need a dumb muu-muu!

[SALESLADY #1]

But, you might as well buy it, it's all that we've got

[SALESLADY #2]

Think of the things you can hide in this muu-muu
Down any apertif, scarf some hors d'oeuvres
We've noted your outline
We've noted your contour
This wonderful muu-muu, it will...

[SALESLADY #1]

Show off your
Show off your
Show off your curves.

[JUDY]

On Thursday night, I'll show up at the party
Stunning the crowd, as I'm dan-cing in...my blue muu-muu

[SALESLADIES]

Good call, Judy...have fun, Judy...