If you're going into clubs for the purpose of scoring
Bound to find bimbos there for the whoring
Oh, honey you turn me on, I'm an idiot
I'm a two-time loser, I'm a little bit horny
I've a big cigarette, lighting for you
Buy you a brandy, paying for you

And I'm sending out my pick-up line
Hope you don't mind that it's not even mine
You know I just like dumb women, with a decent rack
I hope you don't mind selfish dudes who won't call you back
Just like flirty and dirty when they want to dance
Who react to the wolf whistle and will give me a chance

But if you have brains that can think
We'll fix that problem right up with a couple of drinks
Cause honey, who needs the logic?
We both have needs, and we'll wind up lonely
And be nursing hangovers from the crack of dawn with no one there
That's something that we can sort of share
I'm gonna ask you again now if you even mildly care

If you're going into clubs for the purpose of scoring
Bound to find someone there for the whoring
If you find another soul with some horns a-growing
Kick off the undies and let's get going
If your head says, "Let's do it" and we pass inspection
Come on up to my place I have protection

Do-do-do-do-uh -huh