-> "Cow Bird of the County"
Original Song Title:
"Coward of the County"
Parody Song Title:
"Cow Bird of the County"
The Lyrics
Ev'ryone considered him the cow bird of the county.
He'd never stood one single time to prove the county wrong.
His mama named him Cow Bird, the folks just called him yellow,
But something always told me they were reading Cow Bird wrong
He was only just an egg when the old cat killed his daddy.
I looked after Cow Bird 'cause he was my brother's egg.
I still recall the final words my brother said to Cow Bird:
Son, my life is over, but you can still get laid.
Promise me, son, not to do the things I've done.
Fly away from trouble if you can.
It won't mean you're weak if you turn away your beak.
I hope you're old enough to understand:
Son, you don't have to bite to be a man.
There's someone for ev'ryone and Cow Bird's love was Robin.
In her wings he didn't have to prove he was a man.
One day while he was workin' the hunters came a-callin'.
They took shots at Robin.... there was three of them!
Tommy opened up the door and saw his Robin cryin'.
Her tattered wings, her reddened breasts were more than he could stand.
He reached above the fireplace and took down his daddy's picture.
As his tears fell on his daddy's face, he heard these words again:
Promise me, son, not to do the things I've done.
Fly away from trouble if you can.
It won't mean you're weak if you turn away your beak.
I hope you're old enough to understand:
Son, you don't have to bite to be a man.
The hunters they just laughed at him when he flew into the barroom.
One of them got up and met him halfway 'cross the floor.
When Cow Bird turned around they said, hey look! Yellow sapsucker's leavin'.
But you coulda heard a feather drop when Cow Bird stopped and blocked the door.
Twenty years of birdseed was bottled up inside him.
He wasn't holdin' nothin' back; he let 'em have it all.
Then Cow Bird soared above them in a blaze of wings and glory
He said, this one's for Robin, as he let the bird**** fall.
And I heard him say,
I promised you, dad, not to do the things you done.
I walk away from trouble when I can.
Now please don't think I'm weak, but I used my other cheeks,
And papa, I sure hope you understand:
Sometimes it's right to fight when you're a man.
Ev'ryone considered him the cow bird of the county.
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Voting Results
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Pacing: | 4.7 | |
How Funny: | 5.0 | |
Overall Rating: | 5.0 | |
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Total Votes: | 3 |
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